Jealousy Is Insecurity

Heavy, my chest feels

but not my heart

It's light as lettuce

so light in fact

that it races through these minutes 

like the wind makes it beat

I feel weighed down and weightless

this anxiety is engulfing

but its based in insecurity 

so in reality

I've got more control than I feel I do

you were with them late and

I am fully aware that my mind

is regularly the dramatic type that

likes to believe you two are

making up and hugging it out

which would be great actually

if my brain didn't tell me you were also

falling in love

It's so silly to say aloud

and if I would trust in your love and your word

and believe in my own worth

then my screenplay writing mind

wouldn't feel so suffocating 

and my chest and my heart

could fall back into automatic existence 

and maybe I could sleep.