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I (love/hate/miss/resent) You

I (love/hate/miss/resent) You

A Poem by Morgan|Intelligent|witty|gemini

When you said we were done
I initially was angry because
I wanted to hate you so badly
but I only loved you.

A few days later,
I realize that, though I do love you
more than anything,
A part of me also resents you.
And maybe my anger was not,
In fact, because I couldn't hate you,
but because I knew a part of me does
and all I want to do is love you.

The last time you asked if I hated you for ending it;
I couldn't, because I understood.
But this time, you didn't ask
you didn't care
and I'm not sorry that I wasn't good enough,
because you're the one who couldn't handle the distance.
let your cravings and desires
override a love
to where you couldn't even feel it anymore

I wish I could understand,
but I cant.
And I resent you for hurting me this way.
At least before I knew you still loved me,
now I couldn't even tell you liked me.

Enjoy your freedom and experience 
while I'm trapped as a prisoner
to my own mind.
The dreams of you continue and
waking up hurts more than I can explain.
But I love you.
And, unfortunately, that will never change.

© 2019 Morgan|Intelligent|witty|gemini

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Added on September 13, 2019
Last Updated on September 13, 2019
Tags: Mental Health, BPD, poem, poems, monolouges, monolouge, inner monolouge, mental illness, feelings, emotions, life, free verse poem, sad, sadness, empty, emptiness




My names Morgan, I'm 26 years old. I have a pretty cool cat and a witty personality. I tend to have a lot of emotions and feelings that I don't always understand or that I understand all to well, eith.. more..