Letter to a friendA Story by Natalie CI was staring at a blank screen, trying to figure out what was going on inside my head and this was the end product. Just some insane ramblings which probably doesn't make much sense but needed to be said. I didn't edit or alter this in any way, so feel f
Hello my dearly devoted friend,
I know it has been a while but you know, you brought me nothing but despair as I tried to walk out of this bittersweet relationship of ours. I know you are always there, under layers of clothes you patiently wait. Hidden to the rest but trapped inside my mind, making it hard for me to resist, even thought I know that this isn’t right. I should have gotten rid of you, yet strangely, I can’t I don’t need you, That is what I keep telling myself but strangely, I still keep you.
Thinking back, you always were; My safety net, When it felt like I was falling too far My sanity, When everything else failed My guiding light, When darkness called my name But mostly The one thing that kept me out of my early grave Cold to the touch you brought me warmth. I know that doesn’t makes sense, specially for those who doesn’t understand this friendship. This unconditional love… Love for the dimensions you brought to my life, Being my savior, my strength .You showed me kindness, a sense of incredible relief So how could this friendship be wrong? Condemned by the masses, I hide you away meeting secretly almost everyday. Rekindling our “tell no one affair” It feels like I am cheating on life, hiding inside the dark corners of the night. Cursing God’s light whilst looking up into the skies remembering Macbeth’s words, like it is all part of a nasty dream… "Stars hide your fires, let light not see my deep and dark desires" Over and over again, they maul inside my head, Whishing that everyone could just let me be, Let us be… Yes, I am your slave, you my kind master I would follow you willingly, no questions asked. The problem is, how do I explain this? How do I make the people understand? I know this isn’t normal, so how could they even begin to comprehend what this fatal attraction is all about. They who stand in the light, do they even know about the dark side? The side, whose existence took over such a big part of my life,. You are like a drug, a sick addiction, making me insane as I sometimes sit, craving your touch. I hear your voice taunting me with your devious chants “Are you alive?” “Are you alive?”
“Are you alive?” Always the same three words, over and over again, knowing just how to get me back within your demonic hand. Leaving me torn, as you laugh knowing what is going through my thoughts Am I? Am I really? Maybe I should Just one little one Just to make sure Nobody would ever know Emotionally I cannot and will not express myself. Never again will this world see another tear shed by the eyes who is forever now wearing a disguise.
The urge building inside as I hear you asking once more "Are you alive?" Covering my ears, I am not supposed to hear. Fight you I must, after all this is a friendship one should never trust. Unwillingly I make my way towards you, to the place where I know you lay and wait, Constantly calling my name… Coming to a complete halt in front of your tempting domain, staring at the scars you gave. Reluctantly knowing that you would always be a part of my life
As I once again, Pathetically Gave in to you cries © 2008 Natalie CAuthor's Note
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Added on April 23, 2008Author
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