21

21

A Poem by Nik'aule

Hit me.

Twenty on the table and I'm feeling lucky,

After all love,

I know how to lose.

 

I know how to risk

Clothes discarded in the wet grass

Under the swish... pitter patter patter

Of a broken twilight

Slower Deeper Faster

Help me sweat out the past,

We'll flick our ashes after

In a pool of memories...

 

Blink...

 

You close your eyes when you kiss me

Get dressed quickly

Yes, we both know how to run

Or so it would seem,

Yet, no matter how I turn the shower steam

This... won't wash free

And I don't know how to love.

 

Leave.

Leave me with nothing but scattered flashbacks

Spread across the mattress like backwards Tarot Cards

Shedding hindsight on a broken past

Matted against my skin like the aftermath

Of passion

Love, I know how to mourn

I could sketch out our saga as the best of love poems

Across my pillow in mascara tracks

Back to the place on the wall where your picture would have hung

If I could afford to admit I was attached

And I would fight myself to not call

Because you might answer

And we might be alright after all

But see, I understand solitude

I understand pain

I understand and know how to embrace the mundane

But love, love

That's the moral of some fable

I push for 21 when I've got 20 on the table

Hit me.

I know how to lose, love

But I don't know how to love.

© 2008 Nik'aule


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Featured Review

Oh damn, to say I'm feelin this is an understatement.
1st verse just pulled me in and was great. There are so many lines here as in,
'You close your eyes when you kiss me/get dressed quickly'
'I understand pain/I understand and know how to embrace the mundane'
The whole 'Leave' verse is f'in serious and I love the 'Hit me', 'Blink' then 'Leave' and the way you
work this whole piece just leaves me speechless.
'I push for 21 when I got 20 on the table.
Hit me.
I know how to lose, love.
But I don't know how to love.'
This is instantly a favorite and very raw/emotional. I love this, going in my library.
Reiterate How much I love the intertwined gambling/love and how you brought this together.
This is a classic, thank you.

J.P.O.et





Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Oh my gosh. This is such a sad and beautiful poem. The way you express the feelings of loosing love and it seems hope of reconciliation with the significant other was heart renching. I believe it is just the opposite with me. I know how to love...just seems no one loves me. I really love you poetry. I will be reading more! Great work.

Posted 15 Years Ago


DOPE, DOPE, DOPE!!!!! I'm in love with your writing and I almost can't read another poet here and get the same satisfaction! That's what I'm talking about! You're incredibly creative and original with how you get your thoughts out. I wished more poets did that same, but then you wouldn't stand out as much. Another in the library, and I'm snapping my fingers violently!

Posted 15 Years Ago


Oh damn, to say I'm feelin this is an understatement.
1st verse just pulled me in and was great. There are so many lines here as in,
'You close your eyes when you kiss me/get dressed quickly'
'I understand pain/I understand and know how to embrace the mundane'
The whole 'Leave' verse is f'in serious and I love the 'Hit me', 'Blink' then 'Leave' and the way you
work this whole piece just leaves me speechless.
'I push for 21 when I got 20 on the table.
Hit me.
I know how to lose, love.
But I don't know how to love.'
This is instantly a favorite and very raw/emotional. I love this, going in my library.
Reiterate How much I love the intertwined gambling/love and how you brought this together.
This is a classic, thank you.

J.P.O.et





Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow... i really liked this piece. love the metaphors and the direction it takes. I was really feeling this piece. great write... ; )

Posted 15 Years Ago


Ouch. I always stick at 20 unless I'm messing around, risking nothing and feel like being a playa.
This is a fantastic poem, with great original imagery all the way through. Everything's kind of flickering, which makes sense because the narrator says "Leave me with nothing but scattered flashbacks", and that's what this is like, but they're not so vague that we don't know what's going on.
Slick flow, but not oily like it's been overdone, just slick like smooth and a pleasure to read. Great rhyming - mostly subtle so it's not a distraction for the reader.

Enjoyed this a lot.
Thanks for posting it.


Posted 16 Years Ago



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278 Views
5 Reviews
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on March 31, 2008

Author

Nik'aule
Nik'aule

The Hills Of, GA



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