For You

he always did everything for him. but perhaps he needed to do something for himself.

I don’t know you anymore.

That soft smile on your face when you see me,

The light touch of your fingertips-

Was it all a lie are you still living it?

Do you even feel anything at all?

 

You tell me, we’re only close friends.

You’ll never see me as anything more.

Yet just the small things-

When you intertwine our fingers as we walk-

When you pull me close as you tell me those words

“I’ll love you, forever and always.”

Is it all purely platonic?

 

You know it’s not like that for me.

Those nights when we had something, when you didn’t deny our spark,

When you told me how you felt and my true feelings came out-

When our true colours were made clear

Those nights I remember and I hold you to those words.

 

“Please don’t leave me.

I need you.”

Those words used to get me, made my heart skip a beat

Made me feel special.

But with a new beau in your bed, i’m not so sure.

 

You’re perfect.

In so many ways, your imperfections were never less than perfect for me.

Yet you hurt me.

Every time you take my heart, toss it into the ocean,

Tear it into a million pieces.

Yet each time you make a mistake, you run back to me.

You tell me you love me, that you’ll stop

That you’ll no longer hurt me.

 

This time doesn’t seem to be much different.

“I hurt you, and I can’t forgive myself.

Forget me, I’m trash- you deserve the world”

Yet now I question, are those words even real?

Or do you know how to play with my heart now that I’ve opened up to you?

I want to believe you, that you don’t want to cause me pain.

You’ve tried to move on from me twice before, and failed-

Is it the same now?

But these hands of yours,

That broken gaze that I’ve come to love-

I can’t even look you in the eyes anymore.

I made you my world, but what use is it when we define ourselves by others-

By our significant others-

By our friends?

 

I did everything for you.

For all your happiness, yet when you got a choice, you chose to be selfish

And masked it as something for my happiness.

But I know it should stop. This toxic relationship of ours.

We need to think about ourselves sometimes and I’ve given you so many chances-

Perhaps too many that you've come to take advantage of my presence.

 

But I’m not your second choice.

Even if I may hold the “most important place in your heart”,

or so you say,

I can no longer do this.

I too have a breaking point-

We all do.

I’ve crossed mine way too many times for you and perhaps

It’s time to look after me?

To pick up parts of me I’ve abandoned in favour of you.

Goodbye.

Reviews

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

fantastic love heartbreakstory, good luck in my competition.

[rowan.taylorrr]

this, this is heartbreaking. it proves true heartbreak and the lies that hurt us the most. honestly, well done

[Nikolean]

thank you very much. it was more of a sudden, let's write out my emotions type of thing ahah.