Power

A battle

Our stances matched,

 both so powerful,

one foot planted firmly down,

 toes digging in the ground,

 the other leg was behind me,

 keeping my body balanced,

looking,

only looking,

so dainty with barely touching

the dirt.

My heel ready to follow the toes and push

against the earth,

 ready to move me further,

ready to move

 another.

 

My hair hung in my face.

giving me just enough vision

just enough vision.

just enough mystery

enough power

to let myself be pushed by something,

something other than myself.

 

I felt it,

felt it rising in my throat,

the need to make myself known,

the need to yell.

I contained it.

My opponent

knew

I was here.

He could see me.

Every muscle.

Every want.

Every try.

Every

Breath.

He could see the blood pouring through veins

 into my pounding heart

 

I reached up

and up

spreading my fingers into the sky

wanting to rub the shine out of a star

 

I drew my spear back,

the point reaching into that same sky.

 

My other palm faced the dirt.

My eyes gazed across it.

It was the hand I used to make food,

to sharpen knives.

I looked right passed it and into

my opponents eyes.

 

He mirrored my every move.

Same reach

Same bends

 

Same heartbeat.

 

He stared and then

He just

dropped his

Spear

It was silent

A beautiful silence

 

I let mine drop too.

 

Calm

All calm

 

My heart

After all of the battles

Calmed

No longer a banging inside my chest

A simple beat

Enough to get the blood through

Enough to remind me I am still alive.

 

The man I was facing smiled.

Author's Note

This my first attempt at poetry. originally this was written like a story but thought it flowed better in free verse.

Reviews

[caesarkreshen]

sup.

My other palm faced the dirt.
My eyes gazed across it.
It was the hand I used to make food,
to sharpen knives.
I looked right passed it and into
my opponents eyes.

That is poetic, but sometimes you are not as poetic because you are too "telling."

I reached up
and up
spreading my fingers into the sky
wanting to rub the shine out of a star

^ Like that. It's a good idea, but it doesn't flow. You don't even need to say I reached up. I think that's it, just give an image. "Spreading my fingers to the sky" and the idea of rubbing a star out are both good, but "wanting to rub the shine out of a star" is awkward.

[Sami Khalil]

My heart
all of the battles
calmed...
Nice write.

[axel]

these seemed like good sarcasm to me
1. spreading my fingers into the sky
wanting to rub the shine out of a star
2. He mirrored my every move
3. A beautiful silence

i liked the comparisms and use of language

[Dr. Wood ?]

yes, like some inner conflict...could easily be prose....very poetic prose...I liked it..but was uncomfortable with the misspelling of HEEL...'Wanting to rub the shine out of a star' How great is that???

[NoelleRash]

well I did not intend it to be an inner conflict but you are not the first to see it as such. Thank you so much for the read and the review. :)

[axel]

GOOD POEM, sarcastic and mature writing,i like it

[NoelleRash]

I didnt really intend for anything to be sarcastic. Where did you see that?

[Marie]

I think this person was fighting someone in a mirror...perhaps made of her own mind.
I think you meant "heel" here.

My heal ready to follow the toes and push

[NoelleRash]

yes. I meant heel but the pun is pretty neat now that i see it lol

I didn't intend it that way but if that how you see it it's fine by me. What does this poem mean to you?

[Marie]

It simply means someone fighting against herself...finally realizing the effort she's expending isn't worth it.

[NoelleRash]

That's very lovely.

[NoelleRash]

thank you

[Ufi Auttorri ~ UfoAutho..]

I wonder if you realize what you've captured, here in this prose/poem? Interpretations are many but for me this scene this vignette is an excellent example of how peace may come to be. Two adversaries, the best of their kind, placed by circumstances beyond their control into opposition... one determined and resolute, the other likewise but with a courage above that of mere confrontation and choosing a higher path, offers peace. And the other, taken with this uncommon act of bravery succumbs to the epiphany of the moment and does likewise. Beautiful, Noelle. ...just beautiful.

[NoelleRash]

Yes you got exactly what I intended. Thank you so much.

[Ed Hart]

it's a strange thing about this life, we can't relax until we discover our power...that you have summoned yours and have cast forth your power in a poem, to me is remarkable...when i was a boy (almost) all the girls were sissies, nowadays they can flat kick your a*s...to me, the poet and the poem are inseparable

[NoelleRash]

Thank you so much :)