An Old Friend

My old friend, it is a long awaited visit

Have you come all this way to touch my cheek, kiss it

To caress my neck, slow and gentle

To bury your nails deep into my mental

I taste the salt when your lips meet mine

It is a shameful pleasure, so divine

Three years I've spent, longing for you

Though I'm aware, I shouldn't do

Because you hurt me, you break me down

You sink too deep, bleed through my gown

I know all this, through experience I'm afraid

Yet I can't stop myself from grabbing the blade

My fingers resist, but my mind needs relief

An old friend can give, though it is brief

Now you are here, your hands on my face

You pierce through my eyes, and do it with grace

As the tears fall down, I say to myself

Only this once, my sanity on the shelf

I'll lay with the darkness, and embrace it fully

I'll kiss the pain, my personal bully

Three years I've longed this, a talk with a friend

To cut me gently, my sanity bend

Whisper sweet nothings, say I'm not worth

To love, to bloom, to walk this earth

I crumble like mountains succumbed to the sea

I sigh with relief, set my worries free

Then as I lay bleeding, you walk out the door

I'm left wondering if I will see you any more.