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Stupid Questions

Stupid Questions

A Story by SwagMaster
"

Questions that really make you think

"
If something eats a zombie, are they a consumer or a decomposer?
Why does Goofy stand on two legs while Pluto uses all four? They're both dogs!
Why do people say 'slept like a baby'? Babies wake up every two hours.
If a deaf person goes to court, is it still called a hearing?
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
If Superman stops bullets with his chest, why does he duck when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 's' in lisp?
If the temperature is zero today, and it will be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
Who looked at a cow, and thought, "Hey! I'll squeeze these pink dangly things, and drink whatever comes out."?
Who looked at a chicken, and thought, "I'm going to eat the next thing that comes out of that thing's bum."?
Do you cry underwater?
Why do people go up tall buildings and pay to use binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do people point to their wrists when they want the time, but won't point to their butt to ask where the bathroom is?
If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made of?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do aliens abduct us if we are the inferior race?
Why do they use a cotton swab on a guy before a lethal injection?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
If money doesn't grow on trees, why do banks have branches?
Since bread is square, why is sandwich meat round?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in', when it's only a penny for your thoughts? Where the heck is the extra penny going?
Why does round pizza come in a square box?
How can you tell when you've run out of invisible ink?
If someone got addicted to counseling, how would you treat them?
Did Adam and Eve have navals?
Can you disappear into fat air instead of thin air?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If Fed Ex and UPS merge, would they call it Fed UP?
If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar, would you believe him?
If a mute child swears, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
What would a chair look like if you bent your knees the other way?
If pro is the opposite of con, then is progress the opposite of Congress?
What happens if you get 'scared half to death' twice?
What would happen if you put a slinky down an escalator?
Why is it called 'after dark', when really it's 'after light'?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Why is 'wise man' the opposite of 'wise guy'?
Why is 'overlook' the opposite of 'oversee'?
Why is it 'night falls' but 'day breaks'?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If rabbit feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?

© 2012 SwagMaster


Author's Note

SwagMaster
Just some random stuff:)

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Featured Review

"Whose idea was it to put an 's' in lisp?" - "Who looked at a cow, and thought, "Hey! I'll squeeze these pink dangly things, and drink whatever comes out."?" those were my two favourites. hilarious story! great idea! it was very entertaining, and i'm glad i read it:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

"Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?" Depends if the person was born blind then I really don't know, but if they became blind during their lifetime then of course, their brain will still dream images of what it know and not to mention imagination.

Posted 5 Years Ago


This was awesome. It reminded me of a time when I tried to write "if fortune cookies were honest," but those just came out depressing.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This was awesome, hate to say I spilled my drink from laughing. I am just throwing this out, have you ever thought about entering something to the comic site cracked?

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

SwagMaster

7 Years Ago

What's cracked?
MoriartyMesa

7 Years Ago

www.cracked.com
They are pretty funny site
Very intersting and like you. It was hilarious

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The "Stupid Questions" are very creative and they actually make you think. Some of them make a lot of sense. This was very entertaining and made me laugh. Excellent!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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AK
Wow! You're thinking is fabulous! I really liked it:D

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LOL! Thanks I needed that!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

haha
this just made my day!
great write!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Okay, this keeps happening to me and it's driving me CRAZY!!!! I keep thinking that I reviewed something, and then I come back and it turns out I didn't!!!! Arrrrrrghh!!

(*pant, pant*)

Sorry about that; I got a little carried away. :P

This was a great write! It made me laugh. These are some pretty stupid questions. LOL Keep up the great work! :D

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I loved loved loved. this.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on November 20, 2011
Last Updated on February 10, 2012

Author

SwagMaster
SwagMaster

Roosevelt, UT



About
I use swag ironically so much that it's not ironic anymore. more..

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