A Chapter by Paul Bell

I want you to follow a man, I want to know as much as possible about him. There’s no time limit. I just want to get some sort of profile on him. Report back to me in one month.

Strange request from Don Gambrina. But as head of Police, it was his public duty to check on people.


The storm was due to hit at midnight heading into the fourth of July. Strangely apt. The chopper would drop him three miles from the target. It would sit for two hours, no longer. Blending into a sandstorm didn’t pose any problems. Running through a sandstorm was plain insanity. Time was not on his side. Planning was near impossible. But insane jobs were what they were, insane.

The target was in sight. He was right, only fools walk about in sandstorms. Everyone had taken cover. He couldn’t believe his luck. He quietly dug under the sand into the tent, slowly entering at the far corner. Two guards, both asleep. Now permanently asleep.

If there was such a thing as opulence in a tent, this was it. Though this was not the time to admire it. He watched him for a while. How many had died at the hands of this man? It felt strange as his hand began choking the life out of him. In a way, it had all started with him.

He had thirty-six minutes to run three miles back to the chopper. This was one flight he wasn’t going to miss.


Jack Malone had worked damn hard to get to the top.

He had now been in charge of the CIA for ten years.

In that time he had made them accountable.

The days of hidden wars were over with. He still had a budget that would probably run some countries. But this money was used differently. Ten million dollars was worth the price to get rid of this one man. It would send a message to the rest of them. We will hunt you down and kill you. This film was proof of that.

The President was silent for a time. The assassin is he American.

Yes, he’s American.

A very rich American. Do we give him a medal as well?

Well, we haven’t for the previous ones.

There’s been more.

Seven before. This is his first on your watch.

Well, Jack, I don’t know where you got him, or if you trained him. But I want to congratulate you on a job well done. Your old boss gave me one bit of advice when I took up the Presidency. He told me to put my life in your hands. He also said you were the most powerful man in America. I’m beginning to understand what he meant.

I work for you, sir. 24/7.

He said you would say that. Thanks, Jack.

I would also like to shake the hand of that man of yours.

Jack Malone thought long and hard for a while. Sometimes this business really grated every living part of him. Just knowing that Sir would be enough for him.

© 2019 Paul Bell

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I like the style Paul and it suits the subject. It's tricky taking an extract like this but you've given enough. I wonder whether it might work better if you signal the dialogue by spacing or using punctuation. No need to go down the old - he said - route. I'm sure you'll find plenty of readers!
Take care.

Posted 1 Month Ago

Paul Bell

1 Month Ago

Not sure why this keeps coming back on chapter 3.
I'm going to finish this at some point. lol
Punchy and nervy writing style. straight to the point. Fantastic.

Posted 2 Months Ago

Paul Bell

2 Months Ago

Someday I'll finish this. lol
Loved this read! Reminded me of that book called No Easy Day where a US Navy Seal wrote a first-hand narrative about the mission which led to him shooting dead the al-Qaeda leader in Pakistan in May 2011. Like that book, this is quite gripping and I feel the guys working so stealthily behind the scenes to protect and uphold values like liberty and democracy are to be really saluted. I’m hoping for a sequel to this. Nice to make your acquaintance, sir Paul :)

Posted 2 Months Ago

Paul Bell

2 Months Ago

I thought in lockdown I would have had this finished, sadly the other 200 jobs I always managed to a.. read more
ok...now i have to find chapters one and two ;) i particularly like the Jake Malone characterization .. just his name makes me think of Sam Spade and Mike Hammer type characters.

Posted 2 Months Ago

Einstein Noodle

2 Months Ago

yeah ... just not motivated .. i have one in the oven but not sure it will cook up much good ;} than.. read more
Paul Bell

2 Months Ago

Four in the morning for fermenting.
Einstein Noodle

2 Months Ago

:))))))))))) worked on it and posted .. just a bit of fun ... fermented long enough ;}
Since I've not read this post from the beginning I feel as though I'm coming in to the middle of the play, but what I do know is that you have a way with words and paint a clear and vivid picture for your reader! ~Sharon

Posted 6 Months Ago

Paul Bell

6 Months Ago

Not sure why this always comes up, since it's chapter 3. Actually, I must bloody finish it. lol
You have painted well a dark world which ordinary people do not see, but I suspect for me, being an ordinary person, it is all out there in the shadows.

Posted 7 Months Ago

Quite a character you have sketched here Paul. Gripping to the last line. I’d love to see where it goes from there.

Posted 9 Months Ago

Paul Bell

9 Months Ago

Sort of got stuck on it, this is the third chapter of 5.
Really good sis. Real good.

Posted 1 Year Ago

Well-written--it's going quite good so far. As shown by the Gulf wars, helicopters don't do well in the sand. Something tells me our protagonist will persevere.

Posted 1 Year Ago

Paul Bell

1 Year Ago

He'll persevere if I ever finish him. lol
Aloha Paul, a little intrigue goes a long way, and definitely has legs. I liked how you set this up.

Posted 1 Year Ago

Paul Bell

1 Year Ago

Wish I knew myself, then I could finish it.

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16 Reviews
Added on November 20, 2018
Last Updated on January 14, 2019


Paul Bell
Paul Bell

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