But wouldn’t a real friend support me even when I’m wrong?

June 5, 2014: But wouldn’t a real friend support me even when I’m wrong? Please "Share" this new Precious Prodigal Post: http://bit.ly/1hgLXSw

Prov 27:17 “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.”

Recently on Facebook, someone posted a statement about love and friendship. The statement said, “Love accepts me for who I am and supports me no matter what I do.”  I certainly agree with the first part because if you don’t love me for who I really am with all my warts and blemishes, you don’t really love me at all. But I have to disagree with the second part.

While it’s true that a good friend is going to love me in spite of my faults, that friendship and that friend aren’t healthy if they’re not helping me to grow. Proverbs 27:17 tells us that a friend is going to make me better than I was in the same way that “iron sharpens iron.”

“Iron sharpening iron” doesn’t sound like warm fuzzies to me. In fact, it has to be rough and abrasive or it won’t sharpen anything. That’s not to say our friends or we ourselves can say unkind or cruel things in the name of “helping” each other. But it probably does mean that a good friend is going to gently point out the truth when I’m lying to myself. They might even say, “What’s your part in all this?” That’s going to hurt sometimes. No wonder Proverbs 27:6 tells us, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend.”

I doubt that I will ever be rich financially, but I am rich beyond measure in the many precious friends I have. The very best of these dear friends have encouraged me when I needed it, rejoiced over every blessing, put their arms around me when I was hurting, and lifted me up in prayer when I was so overwhelmed I couldn’t even pray for myself.

But that’s not all they’ve done. They have also challenged me to be better than I am and to do the right thing no matter what anyone else does. And they have quietly and patiently reminded me and held me accountable when I didn’t. I need that sometimes because even though I like to think I’m doing the right thing and that my motives are right, I’m sometimes too close to a situation to see it clearly. And just because my prodigal is so often wrong, it doesn’t mean I am always right.

I’d like at times to have a friend I could point in some direction and say, “Sic ‘em,” but that probably isn’t going to better me in any way or help me grow into the person God would have me to be. Good friends will tell me the truth as they see it. Are my feelings going to be hurt? Sometimes. Should I listen anyway and then objectively take a look at my situation from another perspective? Absolutely. Our friend hasn’t become our enemy by telling us the truth. (Gal 3:16)

I need to insert a word of caution here. These Scriptures don’t give us license to tell everyone where we think they’re wrong. If there’s not a loving friendship built on trust, our friend won’t be willing or able to hear anything we say, and we need to keep our opinions to ourselves.

Challenge for Today:  Can you, just for today, agree that you are sometimes wrong? Can you listen to and consider feedback from a trusted friend who tells you the truth?