The Woman In The White Dress

The best man watches his friend's bride.

Standing next to my best friend

Whispering comfort into his ear

My focus splinters when the church door opens

And his bride stands in the entrance

The whole room goes silent

Her head bowed veiled in white

Bouquet in her steady hand

She raises her head, with passion in her blue eyes

I straighten my stance

As she begins her march

All too soon, she's standing near me

She glances at me

I avert my eyes

And feel my face heating

These thoughts are not right

I shouldn't feel this way

All I can think is how I will never touch her lips

Put my hands on that thin waist

Never hear her moan my name

And never tell her that I love her

Author's Note

Didn't turn out how I thought it might, but, please review honestly!

Reviews

[Sunflower/Sara Kendrick]

Sometimes the truth is too much..This person will have to go through life possibly desiring a love that can never be but then again maybe the person that he desires is waiting around the next corner..It was alluring and held my attention..Sunflower..

[Goodbye]

This is really good :) It's deep with the emotion, making it very strong. Good job in writing it.

[Weaver]

I can't offer anything except proofreading (I don't review poetry), and in that area, this poem is nearly perfect:
no comma after "My focus splinters"
no comma after "She raises her head"

[Jim Parson]

This reminds me of one of my all-time favorite movies, "Love Actually". One of my favorite scenes from any movie is when he finally tells her he loves her and then walks away telling himself, "that's enough now."

I think this is really good, Elena. You made your point well...everyone that reads it will understand what you want to say. My only comment would be, you could have elaborated on his pain a bit more and I think it would have made it a bit stronger statement. Love it though!