play.j[ar]izzum

she knocks / with each pie[r]ce[s] / the cerebral doors flung wide open on precarious hinges / revealing overwhelming seen.her.rea[ch] / possibility of what could be /

and what will never be / because of lost screwdrivers and time…wasted / like brine pouring from the eye of an orphan.age…restrictions huff and puff / supporting walls collapse / and the doors slam shut

 

Author's Note

This is a tribute to the style and intrigue of L E.
Thanks to both you and U.C.C for inspiration and friendship over the past year.

Reviews

[Gary H]

Clever work. I always play around with peace of pieces or the other way around. This stylised fashion is obviously very different from that but is a vastly more superior play with words which is, after all, what creative writing is all about. I like the images, 'lost screwdrivers and time' is intriguing. Nice write.

[Shalini R]

thats very interesting
im sorry ive nothing else to say really
i liked this, its cool.
different

[E. M. Murren]

This is an interesting organization for a poem. I like the double entendre feel to this piece. Really interesting work... in the good sense of the term interesting. LOL Cheers.

[Bubo]

Have to agree with below reviews.............have not seen this style of word play,but your words sure pack
a punch!!Such engrossing imagary!!
Brine...........oily, yuk!

[Melanie Jane Boicourt S..]

I do not know that style but I liked your word choice in this poem.
Thanks for sharing.
Love All, Mejasha

[Emily B]

This is one of the reasons I love your work so much. It is clearly so different than my own. I feel like I have to reach beyond myself to even wrap my mind around it.

[eli mercuree rue]

and this poem reminds me of three.15

for weird reasons

hmm

ok

[eli mercuree rue]

oh


and you are welcome..


bam bam

[eli mercuree rue]

were you
play.gah.rising
or just playing with
your superior
intellect?

according to the bebill
you created us
ergo our thoughts are yours
so maybe you were going back to
something you neglected

or she neglected
when she shat
down
on your hinges

creeky
hinges at that

hmm
don't know if i should be thinking
of [s]trapped or not
but
seen.her.rea[ch]
hah
has put my mind theeeeeeeeere

is L E morbid
haha
or is that you?

hmm

anything
too intimate
gets a little
weird
with you
like an insecurity


it all comes through
the screeeeeeen
and i can't sream
when i see it coming

boylan

fix the structure
to fit the flow

do it.


oh
and nice job

i feel like drawing
a picture
for it
now
hmmmmmm