Dementia

I hunched over the corpses surrounding me.My shoulder blades were folded upwards like a warriors sword left in the harsh earth.I hovered over the bodies,and deeply inhaled the scent,death my favourite smell. I loved the smell of death,I snorted the smell as if it was cocaine.The deep and unpleasant odor entered my nostrils,and pleasured my dark thoughts.

I walked through the piles and piles of corpses.I thought I had killed them all.I grinned as my blood covered blade shinned in the fires of my little hell hole.I heard moaning.I shook my head.The last and final surviour moaned in agony.I walked over to the half dead naked corpse,I stomped on what was left of her,mangled body,as she shrieked,I stomped on her neck,and heard the vertebrate snap.I grinned as I heard the echo of the snap in my hole of hell.My shredded wings folded themselves behind me as I fed on her dying flesh. 

Reviews

[Ella]

Alright, I shall be "That guy".
Few things I noticed. First line "I hunched over the dead corpses surrounding me." You don't need the word dead in that sentence, corpses means dead bodies.
Second, I found it hard to read because of the repetitive words. If I was you I'd find a synonyms to a few words like: smell, death, snap. Examples could be: stink, wiff, stench, deceased, fatality, break, crack, shatter.
Final, this is just a suggestion. Make a small quick transition from the main characters dark thoughts to the final survivor. It just kind of.... happened.
That's all! Sorry if this seems rude or harsh, just my thoughts.

[Soul Fire]

Thank you for your review,it's appreciated.I haven't completely finished this piece yet,so suggestions are always nice to have (: I wasn't done editing it either,I just wanted to see what people thought. (: Thanks so much

[Ella]

Welcome. Truthfully I hoped you hadn't finished it yet xD I'll get Dani to tell me when it is done and I'll come back on to finish reading it. Might want to do a few edits and I can send Dani back on and she can help you with editing if you need. Though I am confused as to why you have the quotations around death.
"I hovered over the bodies,and deeply inhaled the scent," There does not need to be a comma between bodies and, and. Space between periods and the next sentence. If you want to keep "Death" like that, add the comma on the inside.
Alright, that's all xD

[Soul Fire]

My keyboard buttons are too tiny for my big fingers >.> and the common button is right beside all the buttons i needed.I commonly add unneeded commas because of it.Thanks again.

[Ella]

Oh, well, alright.

[Soul Fire]

Anything else ? :P

[Ella]

I can be nit picky if you want and try to find other things :D

[Speak in Silence]

This is just my shade of dark (; I could imagine the whole thing happening I love this, I absolutely love dark work (such as this). I think its cool how its short also, awesome, amazing, wonderful job (:

[Soul Fire]

Thank you so much,I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[Speak in Silence]

You're welcome (: I actually loved it! (: