Of Friends Lost

A poem for friends of the past.

I haven't talked to you in a while.

But there are things I need to say.

I must tell them now, for soon

we will each have gone a different way.

Do you ever wonder what happened,

those many years ago?

We were the best of friends, but now,

I feel you are almost a foe.

Was the fault mine, and

do you blame me?

For the death of our friendship

which always felt meant to be?

I thought it was simple.

We just grew apart.

But in leaving you,

did I hurt your heart?

I am sorry, my past friends,

For any grief I have caused you.

And want you to know that

I feel that same sorrow, too.

I will always mourn the deaths

of friendships I will sever.

Instead I wish that our friendships 

had lasted forever.

Author's Note

Reviews and advice would be greatly appreciated! I wasn't totally convinced about the last stanza, so tips on that would be great!

Reviews

[Owen Aldin]

Its a really good read and perhaps you have already changed the last stanza already as I think it flows well?

[ReadsAtDances]

Thanks for the review! I haven't actually changed the last stanza, but I'm glad you liked it!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

This is touching but beautiful. Nice rhyme scheme, too. I have suggestions for your last stanza-- You can chose from "death of friendship" or "friendship that we sever" so it will not sound redundant since death is closer to sever which means to cut off like:

I will always mourn and weep
For this friendship that we sever
I wish you were here with me
With a love that lasts forever

Well-done!

[ReadsAtDances]

Thank you for the review and feedback! Looking back on it, the last stanza is redundant, and I really like the one that you wrote. Thanks for the advice!

[Mischa]

This was really well written! It's pretty touching too and I could personally relate to the poem's theme. I actually liked the last stanza. If there was anything I would change, it would be the last line of the 5th stanza. It didn't feel as "natural" of a rhyme as the other rhyming pairs. Overall, keep up the good work!

[ReadsAtDances]

Thanks for the great review! I did notice that fifth stanza sounded kind of weird, and I moved around some words to try to fix it, but couldn't really seem to get it to sound quite right. I liked the message though, so I didn't want to change it too much. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

[Flopp]

This is a really touching poem. The rhyme scheme is ABCB (correct me if I'm wrong) and there is meaning behind every stanza which works well with the rhymes. I don't think there is anything to change from the last stanza, but I do have a suggestion: I will always mourn the deaths of friendships lost, Instead I'll do anything and restore it at any cost. I know it's a bit simple but writing poetry has never been my strong point. To finish it off though, a true friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg - even if youre slightly cracked. :)

[ReadsAtDances]

Thanks for the review and kind words! I like the stanza that you wrote, and like the idea of ending a poem on a stanza that is simpler and shorter than the others. Also good puns are a great way to (fri) end a review!

[Flopp]

Very punny