Fracture

Fracture

A Poem by Rhia Thurman
"

Death has struck again.

"
My body is not mine 
My soul a disentanglement 
My mind is fractured 
My thoughts; I cannot channel them 

Though I am here and breathing, 
I am heartbroken and seething 
Because I may be alive and well 
But you still lay where you fell 

I am happy that you were with me 
For as long as you could 
I'll always love you 
You know I do 
But something that I can't forgive 
Is that you didn't take me with you

© 2015 Rhia Thurman


Author's Note

Rhia Thurman
Yet another piece of writing I wrote just after a funeral. This particular one was for my great-Granddad who passed in July. I'm not very good at writing with rhyme so if it doesn't work, I probably already know about it...

My Review

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Featured Review

A poem doesn't necersaly have to rhyme, the best thing about the poem is the message you want to give.
I'm sorry about your great-granddad, I'm really sorry.
The poem is really good,
''But something that I can't forgive
Is that you didn't take me with you''
Really deep poem...

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhia Thurman

5 Years Ago

Thank you for the review and for your sympathies.



Reviews

Waw
i know this a sad write
but you really bring the reader close to your mind and every thought
how broken one feels when someone dear passes away .......


Posted 4 Years Ago


I find this a very beautiful piece that once again you have written. I am truly sorry for your loss, but I will say that when we write from an experience such as yours ,we actually WRITE with voice. This piece is a great example of this. Great Job!
~Hannah Grace

Posted 4 Years Ago


The message of the the poem is really good and makes the reader to think about those whom he loves most.
Last two lines are pretty sad, as they take you to the world of loneliness, where there is no one beside you.
Your Granddad would be proud of you for writing with such emotions for him
Keep writing


Posted 4 Years Ago


A short but powerfully penned emotive poem, final farewells are always difficult especially when that person was so close in life !

Posted 4 Years Ago


I am deeply sorry for your great-Grandad. He should be a man for you, who would be the greatest man who ever walked on earth. Let me add

" Dead is the person, who has no one to remember him"

But, how can your great-Grandad be dead, if there is lovely poem like this and written by a poet like you?

A great tribute. Keep writing!

Devanshu

Posted 5 Years Ago


Enjoyed reading, especially love the title you gave. Very sorry for your loss. Beautiful poem

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhia Thurman

5 Years Ago

Thank you for the kind words and for the review!
Beautiful and deep poem. I agree with Lizardo. A poem doesn't necessarily need to rhyme. The most important is the message it delivers. And your poems, they are right from where they should be... Right from the heart. And, again, I am really sorry about your great- granddad.

-Moonlight.

Posted 5 Years Ago


A poem doesn't necersaly have to rhyme, the best thing about the poem is the message you want to give.
I'm sorry about your great-granddad, I'm really sorry.
The poem is really good,
''But something that I can't forgive
Is that you didn't take me with you''
Really deep poem...

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhia Thurman

5 Years Ago

Thank you for the review and for your sympathies.
my mom passed last september...i relate to this feeling...

those left behind feel the loss...those who pass, move on...surely their love remains in our hearts.
first two lines of second stanza really struck me.....

jacob

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhia Thurman

5 Years Ago

Thank you for the kind words and review.
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Gee
Nice.You're far to young to be popping off anywhere.Doesn't have a consistent rhyme,doesn't need it.Leave the simple rhyming stuff to us simple folk

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhia Thurman

5 Years Ago

Wow, literally just reviewed one of yours as well. Thank you very much for the review! And yeah, 201.. read more
Gee

5 Years Ago

You're most welcome

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682 Views
10 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 1, 2015
Last Updated on January 4, 2015
Tags: death, funeral, sadness, mourning

Author

Rhia Thurman
Rhia Thurman

Milton Keynes, Bucks, United Kingdom



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