About me...

About me...

A Poem by Rhianne Ney
"

part of me actually

"
I sing in the shower only,
The four walls admire its beauty,
This is my stage,
Created by an delusional mage.

I danced in my room,
Stepped on my foot and boom,
Laughing while lying upside down,
Breaking my own crown.

I speak in front of the mirror,
Imagining a shining armor,
With a sword in my hand,
Conquering an enchanted land.

I beat the drums in the air,
Loving the bounce of my hair,
A music in my brain,
Playing again and again.

I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's creator,
With this, they will always remember
That someone like me exists.

© 2013 Rhianne Ney


Author's Note

Rhianne Ney

My Review

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Featured Review

A beautiful piece. I always like poems about oneself because before anyone else, we should know ourselves.

I only have few suggestions here. You have the rhyming aabb from the first up to the fourth stanza. But I found out that you broke it in the last one with abac format.

I think it would be better if:

"I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's designer,
With this, they will always reminisce
That someone like me exists."

I hope this would enhance this piece. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Sure, thanks for that (:



Reviews

Such a powerful write, brilliantly written. :-D

Kaze~

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

7 Years Ago

Thanks for the read :D
CrownedDevilx

7 Years Ago

Your very welcome. :-) :-D
These are the things that we all do. You have put it all in such a nice way. Lovely.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for the review (:
A beautiful piece. I always like poems about oneself because before anyone else, we should know ourselves.

I only have few suggestions here. You have the rhyming aabb from the first up to the fourth stanza. But I found out that you broke it in the last one with abac format.

I think it would be better if:

"I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's designer,
With this, they will always reminisce
That someone like me exists."

I hope this would enhance this piece. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Sure, thanks for that (:
"I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's creator,
With this, they will always remember
That someone like me exists."...these were my favourite lines...i liked the flow of this poem...it's a really nice and sweet piece of writing...it sounds so frolicking and elegant..nice work!!Keep it up!!


Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for the review (:
かわいい~! I just got a different image of you, but not in a bad way. I admire the way you can just let your feelings out in your writing so explicitly...it must be very therapeutic sometimes. I love the first line of the last stanza, it really sums up recreational writing, doesn't it! Nicely done.

^.^/100

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for the review and for reading. I'll read yours if I've the time(which I'm lacking because of.. read more
Writer #00

8 Years Ago

No problem, (and I understand, I haven't had much time either : ) ).
Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

(:`
Silly things we all do in life, you made it fun here. Putting thoughts on paper makes it all real...and your unique creation.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for the wonderful and kind review
Frieda P

8 Years Ago

My pleasure.
haha....nice flow and great lines!! by the way which songs ??

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Muhammad Qasim

8 Years Ago

on top if my to do list
Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

(:
Muhammad Qasim

8 Years Ago

:)
great poem, as you know I am imagining things to write constantly..It is a great world to be in...But you need an S on the final word..Exists..not exist

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for the notice~!
I love it don't worry I sing in the shower :) lol 100/100

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Hello, fellow singer! We have a golden voice in the shower only ;D
Ruby

8 Years Ago

lol :)
Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

;D

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1872 Views
44 Reviews
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Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on September 8, 2012
Last Updated on March 27, 2013

Author

Rhianne Ney
Rhianne Ney

Baguio City, the city of cold temperature, Philippines



About
So there I'm back from the depths of High School Life and can now post anything possible. --- Notice: To some book supporters, I deleted all of them for some issues that I have to battle right no.. more..

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