About me...

About me...

A Poem by Rhianne Ney
"

part of me actually

"
I sing in the shower only,
The four walls admire its beauty,
This is my stage,
Created by an delusional mage.

I danced in my room,
Stepped on my foot and boom,
Laughing while lying upside down,
Breaking my own crown.

I speak in front of the mirror,
Imagining a shining armor,
With a sword in my hand,
Conquering an enchanted land.

I beat the drums in the air,
Loving the bounce of my hair,
A music in my brain,
Playing again and again.

I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's creator,
With this, they will always remember
That someone like me exists.

© 2013 Rhianne Ney


Author's Note

Rhianne Ney

My Review

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Featured Review

A beautiful piece. I always like poems about oneself because before anyone else, we should know ourselves.

I only have few suggestions here. You have the rhyming aabb from the first up to the fourth stanza. But I found out that you broke it in the last one with abac format.

I think it would be better if:

"I put my thoughts on paper,
I am my world's designer,
With this, they will always reminisce
That someone like me exists."

I hope this would enhance this piece. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Sure, thanks for that (:



Reviews

Aww I love this poem! It's so incredibly relatable. I felt like you were talking about me sometimes. So fun! Loved it. One for my shelf for sure. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks for shelving it, (:
Imaginative & fun :) The last verse is very astute. Enjoyed!
~pat

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thanks a whole lot :3
Playful and beautifully magical. Great write. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

Thank you :3
I stare off into my own pieces of fantasy sometimes then write it down lest I forget all of the places I've been to, where I know they exist... This is a very charmng, lyrical verse that probably many people including me can relate to ;)

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

I'm glad you can relate to it (:
ahonhonhonhon.... This was for the assignment is it not?

Anywayz :) You're trademarks are still trademarks don't remove that k? So keep that up and at your last line that should be exists XD Anyway good so far

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

Yeah... I'll edit it... some lines
I know what its like to be a daydreamer, and I have to say the "singing in the shower" thing fits perfectly. Could relate to it well

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

It's good that you can relate to it :D
I think this poem is so GREAT! I can relate to a lot of things in it : )


Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

I'm glad you like it ;D
Wow that is sooooooooooo beautiful!!
I speak in front of mirror as well!!
Its really good.. I am putting it in my library!!
Good going Rhianne!!
100/100

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Anonymous Girl

9 Years Ago

My pleasure :)
Rhianne Ney

8 Years Ago

;D
Anonymous Girl

8 Years Ago

:)
this is a really quirky sweet little poem and i really liked it. very nicely written

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

thankee!

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1873 Views
44 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on September 8, 2012
Last Updated on March 27, 2013

Author

Rhianne Ney
Rhianne Ney

Baguio City, the city of cold temperature, Philippines



About
So there I'm back from the depths of High School Life and can now post anything possible. --- Notice: To some book supporters, I deleted all of them for some issues that I have to battle right no.. more..

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