Old Love (second thoughts)

Ballad in alternating iambic tetrameter/trimeter (8/6/8/6 counts) and abcb, defe, ghih, etc; rhyme scheme.

It’s well I know of lonely nights …

these ever longer days.

Each time my lover's strayed-away

and I'm the one who stays.

Lost rivers from my many tears …

then, flowed to sorrow's seas,

with plaintive, soft-sent sighs to thee,

beseeching on bare knees.

Too well I know that painful grip

of steady, lonesome days,

and dread the fall of eventide,

devoid of your dear ways.

Comes ever to my waiting hope,

unanswered, echoed calls …

there's no relent to this dire need;

too sad, each tear that falls.

Shhh! Listen, hear this heart of mine

sing sweet our love's refrain …

oh, do your feet begin to dance,

or does it bring you pain,

to know that stars cannot take back

what's twinkled in our eyes …

nor, moon forget that which he's seen

on high from warm night skies?

If you shall answer with a, "Yes,

my soul is lonely, too!"

Why not then give us one more chance,

to make old love brand new.

Richard W. Jenkins

©2019

.

Author's Note

Painting: Oil on board, courtesy of Pinterest.

Please, feel free to leave hard critique, but know what you're talking about. 🤔

Reviews

[Lisasview]

Hi Richard,
Yes I am back!!!
Gosh over 5 weeks of being too ill to read and review…and, of course write.
I was delighted to come across this wonderful ballad of yours which I do so relate to.
It flowed so well but then again all your poems/sonnets do. With the knowledge I now have “up my sleeve” I was able to see (feel) the rhyme scheme, which made your ballad even more enjoyable. I had to chuckle when I read your notes..
I love the whole notion of the stars twinkling in your eyes… the metaphor is great.
The sad feeling one has when that twinkle is gone and the hope that it perhaps can be rekindled.
Part of me wants to respond to each of the lines in your ballad as I connect deeply to your words.
Lisa, back to connecting

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Lisa Dear 🍂

"Happy 2023!"
It is so wonderfully delightful to feel your warming presence again; especially, when it's well and energy-filled … I'm happy to know you've healed very nicely, finally!
Oh yes, the Ballad form; hopefully, you'll be composing in it soon enough. : )
So much of import and enlightenment is often in the notes; especially, when one's knowledge allows proper understanding.

We both know how rare rekindling old love can be, eh?
Thanks for such an interesting review, Lisa … big hugs! ⁓ Richard🖌

[Lisasview]

Oh it is so wonderful to be back... Honestly I have that stupid lingering cough but other than that I am up and in action. Read and reviewed quite a few today.. and, so looking forward to tomorrow as I plan to go back to my unfinished poems...
L

[Richard🖌]

Sounds good. : )

[Lisasview]

So tomorrow morning I will start..
Missed you more than you will ever know..
Lisa

[Amy R]

Another GREAT write which I can relate to.
Keep writing, excited to see more of your works.

[Richard🖌]

My goodness, Amy!😳

Let me pinch myself … how can I have become so lucky with all your attention on this fair day, to be the recipient of multiple reviews in a row for my humble verses? I don't know, but one thing's for sure … I love it and could get used to the way it feels! ; )

It's not just the awesome compliment you leave, but how encouraging that you want to see even more of my words … sighhh*

Thank you ever-so warmly Amy ⁓ Richard🖌

[Amy R]

Aww, I meant it in every word I used in my review,
your poems caught my attention to,
so that's a "good" luck !
You're welcome.
-Amy

[Starbaby]

You have a way of making the words flow effortlessly, your meter sheer perfection. Poetry should flow like liquid honey and coat the reader's mind in warmth and feeling. This does just that. A most pleasurable read my friend.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, so much, SB 🌾

For your lovely words of praise and expressed appreciation of my humble poetic efforts.

My very best to You ⁓ Richard🖌

[Kim S.]

This is so very beautiful, I really enjoyed this write.
Simply lovely.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Dear Poetess,

For selecting this little heart warmer to read and review for me, and for your inspiringly gracious compliment.

A most happy Autumn to You! 🍂 Richard

[jaye river]

this is so lovely, it flows so naturally i couldnt wait to see what the next line would be. and the word choice makes it feel even more timeless.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Jaye,

Your most lovely review for this romantic little piece in homage to the rekindling of love's once quenched flame is more than amply gracious.
Your warming comments make sharing feel all the more worthwhile and enjoyed.

May your Autumn be as lovely as these wondrously inspiring thoughts you've gifted a hopeful bard! ⁓ Richard 🍂

[K writes]

to know that stars cannot take back
what's twinkled in our eyes …
nor, moon forget that which he's seen
on high from warm night skies?

Maybe but it sure can dim the light in someone's eyes, sometimes be blinded by that light as well.
Love takes two, when one decides not to love anymore it dulls that shine for one half of that party.
This is a since heart warming write though.....

[Richard🖌]

Oh-yes, Dear Kay 🥀

I so deeply understand your sentiments and completely agree, as the first four verses of this rather pensive piece also concisely convey … it's said, "Great minds think alike." : )

Despite our shared skepticism, how thrilled this hopeful bard is that you've allowed his humble words to warm your gentle heart.

With hugs 'n blessings of grateful thanks! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[no tell writer]

Such a wonderful and beautiful write. This is lovely.
Your writes flow so naturally and they are touching.

[Richard🖌]

Such tenderly warming words, Dear Katzie✨

How can a grateful bard help but feel a blush flow through his very fibre, when a lovely poetess's voice embraces his senses ever-so graciously with her approving assent.
You make me feel happy for writing and sharing.

A big thank you HUG, Lady Katzie! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Beccy]

To me, this has the sense of someone writing about their own passage through time. A charting if you like, of those moments that come to us throughout life, of opportunities lost, or perhaps not recognised before the page turns and it becomes too late to turn back the clock. It has a slightly melancholic feel, but is utterly charming and lyrical and reads effortlessly.

Classic poetry at its best.

Beccy.

[Richard🖌]

Beccy🍂

Such a lovely surprise it is finding your always appreciated, highly-regarded, and creative review 'neath this rather pensively involved piece.
Your insightfully brilliant interpretations never fail to let me know we're on the same page, inspiring deeper feelings, perspectives, and dimensions to ponder … what could be more stirring; especially, when it's all from such an admired artist, as yourself.

Thank you, Dear Beccy, for your keen, inspiring praise and expressed appreciation.
Ever beholding! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Anuja Sharma]

"Lost rivers from my many tears …then, flowed to sorrow's seas"
I truly like the way this piece starts with so much pain, knowing one's sorrows and loneliness, but what we all need in life is love, companionship and honest relations. And that's what it ends with. I really dig this poem Richard. Great work, amazing lines, connecting emotions.
Regards,
Anu

[Richard🖌]

Ahhh, Dear Anu 🌾

There nothing quite exciting and warmly gratifying than receiving intelligently rendered critique for one of my deeply heartfelt poems … I love being on the same page with a skilled reader. 😏
Not only do your dancing words speak to my core, they've left me inspirationally wrapped in your appreciative knowing glow of love's earnestly mutual power.

With my warmest hug of thanks to Thee! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Anuja Sharma]

You're most welcome Richard. It really feels so connecting when you encounter such beautifully written pieces, umm the most amazing part of reading I would say. Keep writing.😊💕

[Richard🖌]

Anu,
You've a, umm, warmly delightful way of "connecting." ; )

[Alexcat]

Ohhhhhh thank you, thank you thank you, this was a truly wonderful read! My heart dances, great counts.

[Richard🖌]

Mm, how wonderful is that?
Alex is the name of my cat!
Now, here you come along,
review me like a sweet song.
Makes my heart skip 'n dance,
better than any old romance. : )

Thank you, Alexcat Dear😻

You're welcome, welcome, welcome, and thank you ever-so warmly for blessing my humble efforts with such inspiringly gratifying accolades.
What more could a bard ask than to make a lovely poetess' heart dance, knowing she considers my poem wonderful with great counts.

Sighhh*
Big hugs! ⁓ Richard 🍃