Sonnet 4

My first love sonnet. Based on, in the words of Sting: if you love somebody, set them free. Choosing to return is love or lovely.

I listen to this sound down in my heart. 
No butterflies flutter; a falcon departs. 
Inside me breaks this windy avalanche 
as it flies to a higher, ribby branch. 

I see the freedom of this falcon's flight
in its shrewdness, caprice, and love-beaks bite. 
I wear the glove to which it plummets,
bounding fast, from misty, submerged summits.

But I fear this feeling will fold or flee,
sealing the feathers that once lifted me. 
Falcon, don't forget me from that far view,
Because you'll lose yourself as I lost you.

So despite my dreaded scares as you shrink
into the distance, "you love me", I think. 

Author's Note

I have an incredible image in my head. I'll be glad if you do to! So tell.

Reviews

[Ban Heo]

oooo great job. I like this sonnet compared to the other ones. With that said give John Keats's "Ode to a Nightingale" a read. I think it would help.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, i have an image...and i see the falcon as the lover...great metaphor.

if there is really love, it will fly back to you..if there is really love, the lover will fly back to you.

the harder we grip, the more we lose the grip on a significant other.

really well done sonnet!

jacob

[Rosa Carlyle-Mitchell]

A big thanks Jacob. You have re-articulated my intention :)

I think sometimes i take it a bit far though, and (insecurely) insist on too large a gap or freedom; one that might sever the bond. Ah well, human we are :)

[KeeD]

In my head this is a poem about an idea, a thought, the motive unknown, but it is shrouded, dark and from the inner most region of the self. Fear of loss of those intense deep idea or desire that one might have been so proud of once upon a time or gloated in. Yeah it's probably in my opinion some sort of emotion, now lost that has left the author scared. I might be totally off but the fact that reading this amazing poem made me think so deeply proves that it is such a great write. I am a big fan of your writing style, the way you chose to word your poems and the fact that you're so cool about it. You don't come of as a know it all, someone with a writers ego, but you seem very down to earth and it reflects in your poems. You are indeed a true professional at what you do. Loved this piece.

[Rosa Carlyle-Mitchell]

It makes me so happy that you like my style of writing. I've never known if its just plain weird or not :) Thanks for having a look and glad you liked! x

[Frieda P]

This speaks to me of selfl-love and the possibility of getting lost within yourself. I see a renewed self awareness, you are indeed a butterfly at the end. I could be way off, but that's where my imagination took me. Nice read, beautifully written.

[Rosa Carlyle-Mitchell]

It definitely pertains to both self and other love! Self love enables you with the capacity to love others in my humblest opinion :) Thank you for reading!