MELODIOUS JUMBLE

A jumbled word poem

Melodious Jumble

bothered  be I can

alert quite I am

since out dusk

gig from in just

of levitating twangs

diverse of fidgeting fans

hypnotic rhythms uncanny

warmth sweltering drifts

guitar down beaten rifts

to wanting  not retort

at children cheeky as token

scold  homes from  or broken

 

Author's Note

Reviews would be appreciated

Reviews

[Kristin Lee]

Very interesting. World jumbles are not my favorite format, but I enjoyed this one. I like how you used the red lettering in correlation with talking about sweltering heat. I also like how your poem was shaped like a guitar and you spoke about the hypnotic rhythms of your guitar. Very well crafted.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Hi Kristen, belated thanks yous, for sharing your valuable views, I shall come by to reply to your read requests some time soon :)

[.]

I adored it! You're poems are the best! You've inspired me in your poems that I have read and I hope you always will! 100/100 :)

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thank you, Katerina, thanks so very much!!

[.]

No problem, it's always a great pleasure to read ur poems :)

[Leslie Philibert]

nice work from a poet who lives in my lost home town...

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thank you very much Leslie Philbert!

[Ency Bearis]

Great lyrical thoughts so melodious

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thanks for your great review Ency Bearis!

[L.Edward]

This is close to the thought process that created it. Like looking directly throught the poets eyes as oppsed to the sturctured reality that we are usually afraid to transcend. Breath of fesh air. Thank you.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

My absolute pleasure....I am touching on the issue of being an unassuming adult amongst a gang of immature youngsters,(the gang dynamics; hasslers, abrasive, intimidating yet quite friendly), so I reflect on my, reactions, over-reactions, to losing my rag, towards a gang of minors, a dysfunctional situation, yet not uncommon.....how faith in youth and my ethical insights/commitments and beliefs about child welfare, have been tested, compromised and completely challenged through my own shock, fears, knee jerk, confrontational methods, I mean who, other than the emergency services and those who work and live with very challenging behaviour is well practiced at confronting people tactically and with just the right authority?? Anyway, thanks kindly for your thoughtful comments Lee. Edward!

[L.Edward]

Your welcome. My pleasure as always.

[Marie]

I read it from back to front, from top to bottom and it still didn't make sense. But I suppose that was the idea.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Regardless, thanks very much Marie for popping by to comment.

[SyberRose]

I prefer regular simple poetry haa..to jumbled poetry...as sometimes I have to read a poem a couple time to understand it as it is when its not jumbled...Rose

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Indeed, thanks for commenting SyberRose

[Frieda P]

Unique read indeed my friend. It has it's own beat and melody this one. Nicely pen'd!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thank you very much Frieda P

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Very remarkable piece. Another concrete poetry on those jumbled words about solace, a tribute to a friend. Really melodious, Sheema. Your guitar speaks all of it.

Good job!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

I am very flattered to receive such a positive review from you Dhaye, I am so grateful, as ever.