Silence

Silence, lead the way.

Hold petty talk at bay.

Meaning, how it fades.

Silence, lead the way.

 

Chatter, cease to sway.

Thoughts aren’t here today.

Ponder naught, nor say.

Chatter, cease to sway.

 

Lips, move ne’er again.

Peace is hardly sin.

Quiet useless din.

Lips, move ne’er again.

 

Tongues, yield for men.

Profundity comes when,

Noise, for long, hasn’t been.

Tongues, yield for men.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Bruce]

not bad.

[J. P. Wickwire]

Oh! I love this! I mean, this is really great! It's so lyrical and brief, and reads delightfully like a song. Have you considered making a song out of it? You really should!

My favorite stanza would have to be the first. The only thing I can really pick at would be, have you ever considered adding an extra syllable to the third line of every stanza? My brain kept wanting to put one there, even though it wasn't supposed to.

All in all though, great writing!
-J. P.

[Legion]

Great message, but the rhyme seems a bit coerced (especially in the last stanza). Still, great message. Kudos.

[Wunderlich]

This is awesome. I love the flow, structure, diction, everything. Great job!