purely physical

Trying to cope.

Maybe you sabotaged last night?

ruined it yourself?

But the longing for another while in bed with him couldn't be erased. 

His touch wasn't the same.

The way your lips moved together wasn't right.

but what is right?

The way your bodies connected felt as if you were trying to jam a puzzle piece where it didn't belong. 

You tried to push the thought of him out of you mind.

Tried to lose yourself in something new 

but you only craved familiarity.

It meant nothing.

It felt like nothing. 

Your mind wasn't at ease 

if anything it was on full drive.

Using him as an outlet replaying the thoughts of him and you.

You tried so hard to engulf yourself in this person, but it was as if a wall was placed in between.

Did you set it there? 

All in spite knowing he's done the same 

but what did you gain? 

IT WAS PURELY PHSYICAL.

This person on top of you was a stranger.

Just using him to find an escape. 

BUT THERE WAS NO ESCAPE.

It only amplified your desire.

YOU TRIED. YOU TRIED. YOU TRIED.

But you can not find yourself there in that moment.

Time passes and you still find you're on top  of one another.

But you're not really there.

You're lost in the past knowing you can never go back.

At the same time what's in it for this other person?

A MEANINGLESS F**K.