Circular Swirls

Circular swirls

outline the curls

of your ebony hair

shining brightly

in the cool moonlight

where we dance upon the air.

 

Circular swirls

made by your lips

in witty quips

that keep me

intertwined

intriqued

with your haunting mind

your charming stare.

 

Circular swirls

marked by your tongue

within my mouth agape

there is no escape from this

circular prance

this sweet enchanting flare

that you have

alit in me.

 

Your hair,

your eyes,

your tongue

are the One

that I have sought-

 

melt into me

in our

circular swirls

my dear.

 

 

Reviews

[Nicholas Hallows]

I really enjoyed this piece. You definitely get carried away on the circular swirls that the rhythm expresses so well. The whole poem had such a sweet and airy feel to it... swirly, for lack of a better word. :)
Just a couple of typos - 'circluar' in 1st line and I think 'intertwinded' should be intertwined or entwined.
Nice!

[JohnL]

I like the irregular rhyme in this 'Swirls/curls (l.1 & 2) Lips/Quips (L.2 & 3) then rhyme goues out of the door. This keeps just a little formality in the verse but avoids totally the annoyance of contrived rhyme. What can I say? I love it. One further typo 'intriqued' surely intrigued (v.2)
John

[Michael X]

Melt into circular swirls- cosmics auras
sensuously entwining- becoming one
the way passionate kiss brings lovers together
like spellbinding moonlight to magic
conceptualizing charm-colors whirling
blending mind-body at subconscious levels
like ultra-violet colors unseen
but revealed in dreams defining romance


Circular swirls
marked by your tongue
within my mouth agape
there is no escape from this
circular prance
this sweet enchanting flare
that you have
alit in me.

[Forest Green]

Romantic and quite sensual...great poem!

I enjoyed this one very much.

Daniel

[poddar kushal]

this is visual. it is in a slow motion and that pulse consumes the reader in itself

[Antonio Valentino]

Swirls make the worlds go round.
So delightful Sid!

Rich

[Seriana]

Ooohhh, I love this! You did a most superb job of expressing the delightful results of circular swirls, in every facet. ;) I like this very much. Simple, sweet and romantic. :)

[Kayla]

This is such an intriguing poem. The way you choose to form your sentances in each stanza really grabbed my attention. Great Job!!

[Jenny Davis]

So wispy and alive, this is! I love LOVE the mood of this, haunting and passionate. Just perfect :)

[robin]

Ebony Hair...I'm still visualizing here...This is a beautiful and balanced mini spell of sorts. It reveals a playful, affectionate obsession. Nothing like a willing partner to keep up morale. Great succinct ovation!