Simon: Chapter One

Simon: Chapter One

A Chapter by Skoo.

The rain hurtled towards the truck, trying to smash the windows. Simon glanced contemptuously at the other passengers. Faceless, every one of them. He felt sick just looking at them, their plain, copied movements, every one biologically engineered to appease. He was reminded of a company who made computers, mp3 players, tablets, etc. Every piece of hardware was perfectly ergonomically designed to pacify. The casing was almost always a peaceful, soothing white. This was the other passengers. Each had a look of complete calm, spoke without elaboration or excitement, moved without a trace of panic. Though theoretically having individual purposes, they were identical.

They think somebody's coming to save them, he mused.

They passed another torn up piece of concrete the size of an elephant. It could have been a block of flats, a prison, a hospital, it didn't matter. Everywhere, the debris of humanity littered the landscape, as though the earth were rejecting it, like a dog shaking off fleas. The fleas have bitten away at their home too much. 

Simon reflected on the inevitability of this small apocalypse. It was humanity's destructive nature that caused this, he told himself. It was not his fault. He merely introduced a catalyst. 

He told himself that over and over while the wind tried to throw the truck into the trees and the branches threatened to beat their way through the truck's armour. 

© 2015 Skoo.

My Review

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IT's really intriguing, and I love the comparison. I think it's worth drawing out more: keep all the good description, but leave some room for dialogue, action, pacing. I can't wait to see where this is going!

Posted 8 Years Ago


Posted 8 Years Ago

So descriptive. I want more. So much more. "like a dog shaking off fleas". I loved that. You're doing an excellent job of subtly injecting information into these wonderfully described scenes.

Posted 8 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


7 Years Ago

Well I was thinking about it when I was cycling home from work, and I think if I get writing now and.. read more
Ben Taylor

7 Years Ago

:D I approve.

7 Years Ago

It's published d: But it's only little. Hopefully I'll be able to do Day 27 this evening as well.

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3 Reviews
Added on January 20, 2013
Last Updated on October 3, 2015



My Circuitboard City Of Yellow And Black, United Kingdom

My poems make little sense because my thoughts make little sense because my life makes little sense. I never class myself as a writer, 'cause I'm not one. I'm just some kid in the corner putting my n.. more..

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A Poem by Skoo.