Regret

Regret

A Poem by R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)
"

I'm ill at the moment, so I didn't go on a rhyming spree like I often do. Haven't the energy. I'll be back on my feet soon. You may like that or dislike it, but I'm still proud of what I accomplished.

"



It just takes a few years to break the undamaged

I sometimes walk through the apocalypse with a fire in my head, as the gears greased with pain and insanity twist and ricochet

The very clockwork rewinding timespans, ransomed, I see what my life could have been like

I tied the knot with someone who left me hanging

I was damned by the cruellest two faces of humanity, put on a leash, strung along

I coined the term loony, there are two sides to every story, if I lose my mind, I’m going to flip

The octaves of Gregorian chants phantasmagoric locusts

My hollow head is full of tales, relinquished of my 50/50, I don’t have a chance

Stitch the wilderness of my flesh into flowers to decorate the grave of chivalry




It just takes a few years to change the undamaged

Diamonds shatter like glasshouses, and I don’t throw stones, I shoot lead

This is my shot, I missed the past, but it’s my target, I have a beef with bullseyes, belladonna

It manufactured a machine in the shadow of man, the true demon is a human being

I’m heavy with the debt of blood, but my veins have paid with interest

Sometimes the mistress of the night reminds me my grim sights will be reaped by scythe

Death is a mechanism, programmed, triggered, and installed in my molecules, you don’t know the full scope, my words an orphanage of thoughts that have no home or father

Cold hearts are conditioned by airheads that need to cool their jets, so fly that I’m freefalling

Can’t even land a punch anymore, I usually just roll with them, and totalled my autobody like roadkill

I needed a hand, but this fist is clamping my sanity and I’m choking on these feelings, because the truth is hard to swallow

I’ve taken so many hits that I’m high on my halflife, smoked out by those who fire falsehoods, smothering the embers of solace




It just takes a few years to shape the undamaged, unwholesome

When I was a free man again, Armageddon was my prosthetic, freedom to walk my hell alone

My heart burns with the beat of feet, as I follow the path to enlightenment

I follow and focus only pacifism, barefoot with blisters, people are to afraid to walk in my shoes, but I will never heel

And while my world is stocked by others through nightshade, the planeswalkers chase my coattails, I’m ill,-suited to the noise

The sound of whispered ellipsis, the silence of my hatred like a still frame picture of what could have been

Before the flesh became a gateway to pain, and when one door closes, another opens, the corridors of my soul are being renovated, the crawlspace is Salem

Locked away from me now, I see what could have been

Each key these shackled fingers play opens with a new note, a death letter

That what was but a baby is now old news, passing with the breeze

And I have burned my eulogy, my nightmares simply so the warmth of the tendrils of fire

Can consume my shattered amethyst, and remould the dystopia into a place where the blues harmony dichotomy of water and sky envelopes, the darkest colour the brightest love

Where the undamaged can rest, before playing the next bar in a song we didn’t orchestrate, a swansong for those who's voices

Are only ever listened to, when their role is only the instrumentation, of silence

After a long night of encores, we endeavour to relinquish our performance to the frontier of the moment

But it will take just a few years to recreate the undamaged



© 2019 R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)


Author's Note

R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)
I very seldom reply to reviews, but I promise I read EVERY single one. I look forward to my next review, because it helps me learn. Even if it's just one word, I promise, I will be ecstatic to have the chance to hear what you have to say. Whenever you write something about my poems, or the themes of my poems, or criticize me it is not in vain. I will listen, learn and be thankful.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

I like it, it's refreshing, easier to read. Sometimes you need to change things up a bit. I can relate to your words, and I think sometimes, things broken can never be 100% fixed, but maybe that's the beauty of experience..

Posted 4 Years Ago


R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

Yes, I noticed you pondered this quite a bit with one of your poems. I think it's a poem I'll take a.. read more
Wow! That is one hell of an animalistic view of one's mind. Abstract writing is a gift that I couldn't possibly match. My compliments to you for coping whilst unwell!

Posted 4 Years Ago


R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

I'm always happy to share my friend!
As an avid rhymer myself, I've been asked to consider NOT rhyming sometimes. I think NOT rhyming looks good on you. Maybe refreshing. You've crafted some killer phrases thru-out this poem, which is what I was focused on while reading, more than overall msg (I'm not good at interpreting abstract writing) . . . "grim sights will be reaped by scythe" . . . "Cold hearts are conditioned by airheads that need to cool their jets" . . . and my favorite, the first line of every stanza. As a survivor of extensive child abuse, I can say that even the undamaged parts are touched & so they transform, etc. Regret itself changes us. As an older person, it's easy to get caught up in regret, looking back at one's shitload of dumb choices & subsequent suffering. Your poem starts out more comprehensible to me, but then the last stanza felt like things were spinning more out into space where I could not understand your meaning. To me, your final frenzy represents how even the undamaged is impacted eventually (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 4 Years Ago


barleygirl

4 Years Ago

Your "barefoot with blisters" passage did stand out to me upon first reading. I really appreciate yo.. read more
R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

I think you're the only one who noticed the double & triple meanings. I think you're very astute! I'.. read more
barleygirl

4 Years Ago

My pleasure!
[send message][befriend] Subscribe
.
Hey! This is a nice poem. I would like to go by what weakfreak said, a little messy in between maybe because of disorganisation.
I don't find anything wrong with meanings, they are all fine.
I think you need to look into the second part.
Otherwise I love the rest of the part, the imagery is nice and I'd suggest you to use other literary devices too. I am sure you can do better using different kinds.
Don't worry so much, you've done great like you always do.😉
Keep it up! And get well soon.

Posted 4 Years Ago


.

4 Years Ago

Oh no, please don't take it like that, I didn't mean that the whole poem was messy, only a little pa.. read more
R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

You never upset you MC. Don't worry, I understand you are trying to help me become a better writer. .. read more
R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

I meant to say you never upset me. Sorry, spelling error.
I think that was very poetic, maybe a little messy, disorganized, but not bad. I'm sorry your not well and hope you start feeling better real soon.

Posted 4 Years Ago


R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

Can you explain the messy parts and how to fix them? I’ll try to patch up any bits you think need .. read more
Ghost writer

4 Years Ago

Well, it just seemed, mostly more disorganized, like some things that you said would have gone bett.. read more
R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

4 Years Ago

Alright, I'll keep that in mind when I next write.

Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

65 Views
5 Reviews
Rating
Added on September 21, 2019
Last Updated on September 29, 2019
Tags: regret, undamaged

Author

R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)
R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)

Burlington, Halton, Canada



About
Most of my poems can be differing lengths depending on the time you want to spend reading them. You can avoid reading anything brackets, or read it all. If you want an in-between, you can read only th.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


georgia nights georgia nights

A Chapter by Papaya


Memorial Memorial

A Poem by Gee