VALID

VALID

A Poem by Sneh



You've right, you're right
Leave troubles far of thine sight
why to sink?
Just after creating magic in a blink
Don't forget to break the link
Link, with all those trolls, all those
Faceless fellas, called critics

Feel heavenly, live daringly
Stay uninfected, most are
Disease proned!
This is adequacy, just lack of literacy
Will bring bundle of fallacy
Pretend not to be a junkie,
Serve as lavishing monkey
Prudency will fall on carpet
Let your feets tap on it!

It's possible and valid to utter
How Impossible !
You've right, you're right
Can't please every heart,
Can't praise every art!
Just few lines ,
Connecting the dots!

© 2019 Sneh


Author's Note

Sneh
After a long....love you all...! :)

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Featured Review

yes, all the damn critics who tear apart what they couldn't write in a lifetime...that kind of writing that stirs the heart and mind...i heard a quote in a movie once..."many writers know the rules of writing, but they don't know how to write.

i like this piece...
j.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Considering your insights here... Thanks much Jacob! :)



Reviews

Holy - kwap! If I'm reading this correctly, you are speaking my language with this piece. Those last four lines are gooooooolden! This may stem from your lack of proficiency in English (don't know how fluent you are), but you are missing some articles ("the"/"a"/"an" etc) here and there, as well as other minor words for grammatical sense (and musicality purposes). Don't say "thine" unless you're going to write the whole poem in archaisms, for it sticks out like a sore thumb otherwise (it would also be "thy" because "sight" starts with a consonant). Better to simply say ".....far from sight". Same goes with "why to sink?" no need of the "to" (musically better), and no need of the"?" either, for the next line is a direct continuation.

Furthermore, don't be afraid to line break at the powerful points. Widow and Orphan lines should be done sparingly, for every time you line- or stanza-break you're saying something (poetry says much more in the whiteness between the lines and stanzas than it does with the actual words). So observe:

"Don't forget to break the link
*With all those trolls, *that extra "link" is not needed (mars the power and flow)
All those faceless fellas **called critics" **these two words could also have their own line (if you want)

Observe again:

"Feel heavenly, ***live daringly ***could have their own line if you feel it.
Stay uninfected,
Most are
****Disease-prone" ****this line could be on the same line as "most are" (if you like), but
most importantly, the expression would be written as such
(hyphenated and no "d" at the end of "prone")

Your only errors, Sneh, are minor technicalities, but overall, this is a superb piece, epitomizing your wit and genius. Well done!

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

8 Months Ago

Thanks for the effort.... I will try to polish ....:)
i luv this one

your wordplay is very advanced


L.S

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

8 Months Ago

Glad you like it.....have a nice day!
I can relate your poem to my own life. Cause I was also trolled by some critics .And your stuffs is awesome it says that it is easy to criticize others stuff but it's not easy to be criticize.(right ). I like your poem thanx for writing this . Keep writing( smiles) 😊😊😊

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Glad that you could relate :)
Thanks dear Taniska..!
I get the feeling the poet has encountered some of those critical comments that are not worded with tact. Sometimes one can grow from criticism, if it's well meant and delivered. Other times it's better to ignore them. As the poem states, you can't please every heart.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Yeas John, I am getting ways these days.... Thanks for stopping by! :")
Always someone throwing a boulder into the river, though you never quite see them.
Anyone can be a critic, you just open your mouth.
But can you walk the walk when push comes to shove, mmmmm.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Yes, I Would try harder :)
Thanks for the review!
Your poem sounds like how I try to be with my writing -- not caring how others perceive it, just satisfying my needs in writing. Your poem shows how it's possible to twist ourselves in knots if we worry about what others say to tear down our art. The trolls are the most uncreative ones. They are jealous of the creative ones. Let's step over these inevitable sharp rocks & celebrate the creation of art (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Margie, thanks much!
Yes, We need critics to become perfectionist;).....
Have a grea.. read more
Loved it absolutely, what a message. Brilliant and fluent, you are a great writer ............ keep going.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Thank a lot ::))
I like this poem, it's quite inspirational. Good job :)

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Thanks alot lovely lady! :)
yes, all the damn critics who tear apart what they couldn't write in a lifetime...that kind of writing that stirs the heart and mind...i heard a quote in a movie once..."many writers know the rules of writing, but they don't know how to write.

i like this piece...
j.

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Considering your insights here... Thanks much Jacob! :)
Very good Sneh...live life on your own terms...do not let what others think influence you or your decisions. Feel free to make mistakes and take ownership of your mistakes. Most of all, be an individual not a lemming.

Good job

Posted 9 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sneh

9 Months Ago

Yes Mr Ted, I appreciate your thoughts and kind words....! Thank you! :)

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Added on June 16, 2019
Last Updated on June 16, 2019

Author

Sneh
Sneh

India



About
Hey, I am Sneha. Fonder of imaginations and poetries. Often times I fail to convey my actual feelings ,so I preferred this. Thanks for the visit!! 🌹 more..

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