The memory of my memory

All that happened beside that window.

The pearl like drops which slip
on the glass ,
Amid the wind who wants to come in,
I am reminded of him,
He, who rests in my mind,
Who returns when I gaze at the window,
He didn't say,
He didn't laugh,
All he did was remind of my past.
After all he wasn't someone,
he was the memory of the window glass.

Author's Note

Hey! This is a poem about which I didn't think too much. I just wrote whatever came to my mind. So, your reviews would be extremely helpful for improving my writing. Please do leave an honest review. Criticism appreciated. And of course, thank you so so much for reading. It really means a lot !

Reviews

[Chase Dylan]

The ending tying in with the beginning so cleanly, like glass slidings... That I liked, and the memories are relatable, as is the word-choice...

I agree that you do not need commas on the end of every line, unless that was done on purpose... Which is fine as well... Flow style is your choice...
As for the pearl line... It would work with a comma after pearl... I think might have been your intent...

Think of punctuation and capitilation as "helpers" to the reader... Helpers that mark the intent of original flow and context... Beatifully penned... Especially for off-the-bat like that...

[Soumya Deouskar]

Thank you for taking time to read my poem! It means a lot to me! And yes, I will make the changes and make it better. Thanks for such an honest review!

[Chase Dylan]

You are most welcome... "Better" is subjective... If YOU like it more... That should be the bar set for quality...

[Ethan]

Overall, nicely done. I have a few comments, however.

"The pearl like drops which slip
on the glass ,
Amid the wind who wants to come in,"

Firstly, this is an incomplete sentence. Secondly, because of its incompleteness, it is unclear as to whether you mean "pearl-like", as in "like a pearl." If that is the case, you would need to include a hyphen.

Now, concerning the entire poem, it is not necessary to include commas at the end of each line. It's a little weird to get used to, but if you took out all lines and placed them in sequence like one looooong line, they should be grammatically correct. So put commas and periods where they are required, and no more.

Apart from the the things I just addressed, I really loved this poem. You are very talented. Thanks for sharing :)

[Soumya Deouskar]

Thank you so so much such a constructive review! I truly appreciate that! I will surely see to the mistakes and edit them. Thanks once again!

[Vasilees Sybissyl]

You have left the meaning for me to interpret, and I love that! I love the idea and I love how you just wrote what you felt.

My advice - read it over and over and try to find a meaning. All you interpret out of a poem with a vague meaning speaks up about a different side of you.

Love,
Vasilees.

[Shasha]

This is short with a memorable ending, it just blew in the wind, a masterpiece!