Words are fickle

Words are fickle

A Poem by Ankita Dwivedi
"

When you see that I'm stuck,get me out. Don't pretend you never saw me.

"
One moment I'm deep in the water,
i'm tip-toing on the border of my terrace the next.
Some are there to care a little,
no one to care enough .
The air is pure , the vibe but toxic.
The words are fickle,
the intentions but mettalic.
The hand to help me out from the water is wavering.
The push, but intent.
I tried to be righteous,
my knees but bent.
I was sailing across the shores of hell one moment .
And now,
to the paradise i'm sent.

© 2020 Ankita Dwivedi


Author's Note

Ankita Dwivedi
Here's a short poem .Do let me know what you think about this .I've tried something different this time.

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Featured Review

I read it through four times, can't say I'm sure what it's about, but can't say that I care for understanding. It reads like slow jazz, it's a beautiful piece that uses words to paint an emotion. You did an amazing job defining something only by its edges. I'd like to read a lot more by you, it seems that you're free-writes would be magnificent, pure emotion and expression.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

Mind can be a very dark and dangerous organ,sometimes.Sometimes,it holds on to a thought and it can .. read more
T.S. Ulmus

3 Weeks Ago

You could never disappoint me. Spill your words, refine them if you must, a true poet bleeds emotion.. read more



Reviews

Finding a corner of solace in a world full of maddening amounts of orientations can sometimes be hard. There could be many reasons for which people would care, but a selfish intent involved makes it transactional and stifling when it comes to being truly honest and vulnerable. Mind does wander and wonder where the nook of relaxation and comfort is, amidst all these relationships that seem charitable on the front but are always on the verge of being transactional. Thanks for sharing this piece :)

Posted 6 Days Ago


Nice one Ankita!
Form: It feels like a journey, calm at first, then the waters rise and the middle is a *harsh section of river which relents and calms depositing her into a beautiful secret spot. Very cool.
(*The harsh section of river= "but toxic fickle intentions but metallic but intent but bent" great pace and a cool syncopated rhythm. The “ck”s “t”s “b”s are hard, forcing a slowing of progress. But we have been kayaking recently and that may be affecting my interpretation. :) ]
Favorite lines & my 2 cents.
“ I tried to be righteous, my knees but bent.” ?The difficulties of trying to be ladylike in the midst of a kerfuffle perhaps?, a marvelous sentence, excellent character reveal.
" The hand to help me out from the water is wavering. The push, but intent." What a terrible feeling that must be! Well presented. It begs the reader to ask WHY?
And my favorite………“Some are there to care a little, no one to care enough .” Great human insight. Occasional sad truth. Pithy line!
Thanks for sharing!

Posted 1 Week Ago


Interesting use of push-pull-you as the dilemma of this persons situation wavers between needing rescuing and being independent.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


I'm not sure what it was about (I'm sure it's just me I'm not great at interpreting poetry) but I like the rhymes and rhythm :) You had a solid ending.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


The dancing of emotion. We can find sadness and happiness in the same minute. I liked the honest tone of the words. Thank you Ankita for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


I enjoyed reading this poem. The rhyme and meaning link well and it's all understandable. tyfs

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

oh! thanks for visiting .Glad you got the meaning , a few poets had trouble understanding what it's .. read more
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Its a poem of contrasts to me; like drowning in a mental monsoon. Needing a helping hand to be saved but no hands readily available. Words can be fickle, yes, so can intent. Try another short poem. The more you write the better you will get. :)

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

oh! sure i will and hope you tell me how it was .thanks for visiting , sweet.
Love, Ankita
i like the title ... there is push and pull in your poem says i! again the dichotomy within us all .. temptations are with us daily .. not just sexual ... all kinds ... its all about the choice aint it!? you have a way with words and imaging ... this one is less prose like than the previous two .. you might give thought to trying a classical form ... i am also abstract and use free verse but doing a more demanding form i.e. a sonnet has always given me a sense of grounding and a more well rounded experience as a creative writer ... Richard is a great one for forms ... it you read him you will see what i mean .. and he is very helpful should you ask him ... but you must be serious about it and prepared to write and re-write until it is perfect in the smallest detail ;)
E.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

yeah !! I am trying to learn the form and will try as hard as i can ..hope i write my first sonnet s.. read more
Einstein Noodle

3 Weeks Ago

do check out Richard .. he is boundless in his help
Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

I am sir ..and indeed what you say is true ..thank you for your humble advice
With your title in mind, your poem made me think of how words can be both friend and foe. How sometimes words can be healing and other times they can feel like perpetrators. I suppose words do have great power. The person using them and the purpose for their use can both affect how they impact. Your poem makes me feel that the words themselves are seen as the force and the person only has minimal control over how they manifest. That’s an interesting perspective. Makes me think of mental illness and how things can take on a life of their own and the person suffering lacks the power to fight against them properly. I enjoyed reading your poem.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


I like. the lines convey a sense of desperation but then a feeling of peace.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


Ankita Dwivedi

3 Weeks Ago

it does!! thanks for your words.
Love, Ankita

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Added on August 27, 2020
Last Updated on August 27, 2020
Tags: darkside

Author

Ankita Dwivedi
Ankita Dwivedi

Noida, Utttar pradesh, India



About
Hey guys!! read my poetry and do give your reviews. I need your support. I really hope that it will lead every individual to find something they felt at some point, a feeling they thought were alien... more..

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