Tinder Island Chapter 7

Please see "Oak Island"

Chapter 7

Ezra did go to his fancy party. The rattle of the front door awoke me. I looked at the clock. Just past midnight. He was home early. Paul's parties usually went on til the early hours of the morning. I didn't want to talk to him, so I turned my back to the door, hoping he'd think I was sleeping. His footsteps came into the bedroom and I sensed him at my side. 

“Cassie. Cassie, I know you're not asleep. Please talk to me.” I opened my eyes and found Ezra kneeling at my side. He looked distraught. “Cassie, please forgive me. I was wrong to look in your phone, I was wrong to accuse you of anything.” He took one of my hands. I pulled my hand away.

“Just saying you're sorry won't fix this, Ezra. What on earth made you look in my phone in the first place?” He looked down. “Why, Ezra?”

“I was looking for Cheryl's number. I wanted to tell you you'd left your phone at home.”

“But that wouldn't have shown you Cheryl's text to me or the phone log of me calling Leo. All that happened weeks ago.”

“I don't know. Honestly, Cassie, I don't know why I did it.” He was looking at me with such pure misery on his face. “I get crazy ideas, like you aren't happy with me or I don't do enough for you, so I start thinking crazy things. Suspect you of insane things. I know you're faithful, that you'd never go behind my back, I know you'd never cheat, but some part of me thinks you must be happier with someone else. Like that Leo guy. You're always talking about him.”

“Leo Lansing is a very good friend from a long time ago. He's not some guy. And it is exaggeration to say I talk about him all the time.”

Ezra took one of my hands again. “Please forgive me, Cassie. I promise I won't do this ever again.” 

“Why do you think you don't do enough for me? Why do you think I'm not happy being with you?” He was now holding my hand in both of his.

“You look so sad sometimes.” He brought my hand to his lips, kissing my knuckles. “You look so sad and I feel like it's my fault, that I am not fulfilling you.”

“Ezra, my mother is dying. I'm going to look sad sometimes. Life is sad sometimes. I can't be happy all the time, that's not how life works.” 

“You still love me?” He was on his knees, imploring me, looking so wretched and pathetic. 

“Yes, Ezra, I still love you.” 

“Will you forgive me?” He was begging and I couldn't say no.

“Yes, Ezra, I forgive you, but remember this conversation the next time you start getting crazy ideas. You can't do this again.” 

He pulled me into his arms. 

***

Monday night I gave up on having a quiet life. Sunday Ezra was at my elbow all day, eager to show his love and penitence. I was glad to get to work Monday morning, back to numbers and figures that made sense. But as I was relaxing with a glass of wine before Ezra's arrival home from work, my phone played Cheryl's ringtone. 

I put my wineglass down when I heard Cheryl's voice. She sounded irrational from some kind of strong  emotion.

“Cheryl. Cheryl, listen. Try to calm down. Tell me what's wrong.”

“The baby, I'm losing the baby.” She was crying so hard it was difficult to  make out what she was saying. 

“OK, I understand. What do you need?” I tried to stay calm and not get caught up in her distress. 

“The bleeding, it won't stop.” Oh my god, what does that mean?

“Hang up right now and call 911. OK Cheryl? Do you hear me? Call 911. I'll meet you at the hospital.” 

I had to struggle through rush hour traffic to get to the hospital. Cheryl had already been admitted and I was told to wait. The waiting room was uncomfortable and crowded. Couldn't they put more chairs in here? Everyone looked preoccupied with their own troubles, talking quietly with family or immersed in silent pain. There wasn't even an end table with stale magazines. 

After an hour, I was called back to the exam room where Cheryl was. Sitting up in the bed, she had her knees up and her arms folded across her stomach. She looked pale and in pain, but was not frantic any more. She winced as I sat down in the chair next to her bed. 

“What's going on?” I asked as I put my hand on her arm. 

“The miscarriage was not complete, some was left in my uterus.”

“What are they doing for you?” 

“They gave me this medicine, to help finish it, get everything out. I could have had a D&C but I didn't want to risk damage to my uterus.”

“Cheryl, I'm so sorry.” She gripped my hand. “Does it hurt?”

“The cramps are bad. Like the worst period ever, times ten.” 

“Are they going to keep you here long? How long will it take to... be done?” 

“They're sending me home. It will be easier to deal with this at home. They say getting in the shower helps. Can you stay with me for a while? Ted is on a plane right now, flying back here from Chicago.”

“Chicago?” I was confused.

“He was planning on visiting his parents in Illinois. I dropped him at the airport this morning. He'll be here in a couple of hours. Can you stay with me?” She started crying, holding my hand hard. 

“Of course I can. I can drive you home and stay with you as long as you need me.” 

***

A frantic Ted arrived at eleven. I calmed him before he went in to see Cheryl. She didn't need someone freaking out on her. The worst was over and now she was tired and forlorn. I left them together, Cheryl in bed and Ted by her side.

As I drove home, my thoughts were now insistent. Did I want children? Did I want to marry Ezra? Did I want to marry anyone? I had always assumed I'd have children, but did I really want that? I'd always assumed I'd get married eventually. But Ezra? That whole jealous scene made me think No. But he promised to not do it again. We worked it out. And he was so good to me sometimes. I thought about the Italian dinner he made for me for our anniversary. We all have our flaws. Ezra seemed to have a lot, but maybe I did, too. Unbidden came the image of Leo wiping the corner of my mouth.

I pushed that away and mentally shook myself. I needed to focus on driving.

Author's Note

Any comments welcome, large of small. Is this chapter too shirt?

Reviews

[MeratheRestless]

1. Too short? No, that's why you're writing a novel rather than a story.

2. Cassie's subconscious is talking, but she isn't listening. She doesn't really know what she wants, does she?

3. While I wouldn't marry Ezra for all the gold in Egypt, because I see storm clouds ahead clearly,, I am curious about why Cassie never talks marriage and children to Ezra? She talks to everyone except him, unless he really ticks her off and she tells him what's on her mind.

4. I think there needs to be more focus on Cassie's childhood as her mother continues to deteriorate. In particular, I want to know why exactly Leo Lansing was so dear to Cassie as a child/teenager and what tore them apart.

5. Since Cheryl seems to be Cassie's best gal pal, I'd also like to know more about the history of their friendship.

That's all I can think of at the moment, but I am enjoying reading. Keep up the good work.