Dream Girl

Just a little something I wrote on my lunch break yesterday...

I threw away my heart,
but she caught it and she'll keep it.
She looked into my eyes
and read my deepest secrets.
To her alone, I expose my soul,
she nursed it's wounds,
and we watched my spirit grow.
My emotional soldier,
My heart stops beating when I hold her,
and I feel hers go double-time
to pick up the slack.
The weight of the world on my shoulders,
but her confidence in me at my back.
If you said she was the girl of my dreams,
you'd be right, because until I find her,
my imagination is where she sleeps.

Reviews

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Beautiful, very romantic, this piece.
Seems as though you are truly in love
Love always inspires as to write doesn't it?
Another deep emotional write.
Well done :)

[Javan]

Funnily enough, I wasn't with someone when I wrote this...
I guess it was written from the love I had to give and not the love I was giving!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Yer sometimes you get so in tune with your heart and what your feeling, that it doesn't matter whether you are with someone or not, you can still write amazing romantic pieces :)

[Sirius King]

My heart stops beating when I hold her,
and I feel hers go double-time
to pick up the slack.,,,nice line

[Willowtree]

Aw, this is so adorable:)
"until I find her, my imagination is where she sleeps"
Wow. aha.. I don't know what to say. I love it :) And you wrote this on your lunch break.. amazing.

[Javan]

Thanks! To be honest, it was supposed to just be about the perfect woman and how she should make a guy feel, but I didn't know how to end it because I had nothing to go on, so I just told the truth! :D

[Willowtree]

Well it worked well, it made the poem sound as if it wasn't quite over yet. Like you were still waiting to meet her.:)

[Javan]

It's true, even tho I didn't do it on puropse!
When I do meet her, I'll def write a part 2!

[Willowtree]

I'd love to read it when you do!

[kayla]

Aww...this is an incredibly cute poem, and I love the ending(:

[nigrum homonculus]

damn....this is good. i mean this poem is pretty multi-layered. i mean the girl you describe is perfect but the reality is no girl is that perfect and in a way thats sad. well done, fed my imagination well