The kiss

The Kiss...

  Warm Southern breezes

  bring distant thunders' chorus

  to red sunset lips...

  briefest, fleeting sun

  lets evening bear witness,

  as forms intertwine.

  Fireflies mock faint stars,

  while cloud castles edge near

  slowly writhing embraces.

  Gifts of water

  drop unnoticed

  upon warm skin...

  their kiss undisturbed.

  Darkest night turns day

  in lightnings' brilliant flashes,

  revealing lovers' still repose.

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

Wow, what a lovein that was. Divine kisses. Aided by mother nature to ensure that it was a magic moment never to be forgotten. Sent tingles up and down my spine thinking about it. Experiencing it, well that would be something else altogether. Lovely description here.

Chris

[AJNJ]

You captured the awesome beauty of both nature and of love in one master stroke of your poetic brush. I loved the settting and the hues and I especially found line 7 breathtaking.

[Patricia Wedel]

dearest T.S. I love the lines--
"distant thunders' chorus
to red sunset lips. Lets evening
bare witness as forms intertwine."
Your talent shows with "lightnings'
brilliant flashes showing lovers still".
gently, Pat

[T.S. Ulmus]

Thank you for your kind apprehension of my words. I feel like you snared them to delicious meaning.

[Patricia Wedel]

Wow... you have tethered my inspiration...
Be safe and well. truly, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

tripped a bit on line 7 wanting to read it with "mock" instead.
but wow, this is a fun ride...
great ending for a poem that is lively with visuals, personification...and electric intensity.

[T.S. Ulmus]

You were right it was supposed to be "mock". It was a poem I wrote more than 10 years ago to a girl who just texted it back to me. I copied and pasted and caught "inter wined" but miss the superfluous s. Those small details take me out of a poem also, I'll see if I can fix it. Thank you for your review.