Major general

A nod to Gilbert and Sullivan and of course much thanks to Delmar who dropped an earworm.

Major General

I'm not the very model of a modern major general

I've information vegetation but mostly hypothetical

I know the Kings of England but not nearly quite rhetorical

From what's-his-name to who's-his-a*s they're all a bit forgettable

I'm poorly well acquainted with the matters mathematical

There's x and y and what the hell's a quotient or a radical?

About the quantum theory I'm teaming with lots of news

With many cheerful facts about the particles that've gotten loose

I could draw a lovely picture but I couldn't do the calculus

And I can name the many creatures which were writ by Dr Seuss

I'm not the very model of a modern major general

Reviews

[Anastasia]

We need more of compassion and common sense than the specialized knowledge that you state here. I have a personal theory that those who aren't good at mathematics have a good heart. So no worries about algebra or calculus as long as the heart is in the correct place. We need more good samaritans then major generals I believe.

[T.S. Ulmus]

Funny, I was a math major, tutored calculus in college. This was only intended as a parody, but maybe I don't have a good heart. Thank you for your review, even if it implies but I am a terrible person.

[Dave Brown]

The world has had enough of every kind of General
We have a large water storage tank and the clone of the little frog in your hand lives inside the water tank's handle
very cute

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Interesting write. I like the prose .

[Delmar Cooper]

This delightfully funny parody really hits its stride at "From what's-his-name to who's-his-a*s they're all a bit forgettable" Then continues on to jump al the hurdles. Thanks for sharing this.
Delmar Cooper -whistling the theme from the Andy Griffith Show.

[T.S. Ulmus]

Holy crap I made friends with a super villain. I hope you take some pride in being that viciously devious. It'll be in my head for hours and I can't even do a parody poem of that one.