End it all

End it all

A Poem by tanaya
"

Just a poem...

"
 

All so silent

All so peaceful

All at rest

 

Then bam

You come in

You ruin it all

 

I don’t know what to do anymore

Im confused, scared

I cant do it anymore

 

Every time I look at you I see those angry eyes

Those mad eyes

That face that haunts my dreams

 

I have tried so hard

Giving you every chance

But you ruin all

 

How could you?

You say you love her, us

But you do this?

 

I was scared!

I needed my daddy!

But you were long lost in that crazy mind

 

I trusted you

And you threw it in my face

You threw my last bit of hope for you away

 

How do you think I felt?

Having to protect my mother from my father?

It crushed me

 

But I had to

I had to protect the person you claim to love

From you

 

The look on your face

Your crushed face

Your heartbroken face

 

It crushed me

It haunts me to this day

And I cant deal with it

 

I need an escape

I need to get away

I need to do something!

 

All this stress

All this worry

All this pain!

 

All caused by you

By this family

By my family

 

And im a broken person

No one can fix me

Im irreparable

 

No one wants a girl with baggage

No one wants a girl with problems

No one wants me

 

I don’t blame them

They can live in their happy lives

And I can go back to hell

Where I belong

 

Im not worth anything

Not tears, not love

Nothing

 

How do you do it?

How do you be so happy?

How can anyone be so happy?

 

Why cant I be happy?

Why cant  be loved?

Am I really that bad?

 

But I've accepted my fate

I know I deserve it

I just hope it ends soon

 

I want it all to end

The pain, the heartbreak

Please, end it all

© 2012 tanaya


Author's Note

tanaya
Please read and comment your thoughts...

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Reviews

I understand this writing n this feeling completely

Posted 6 Years Ago


actually i sympathized with the feeling of the persona
and the poem is great
merci
=]

Posted 7 Years Ago


Powerful and raw. Good piece

Posted 7 Years Ago


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ATG
A very depressing poem, but very well done. After reading a few of your poems, I'm starting to have a strong dislike of your father. This is good, in sense. It means your poems are evoking an emotional response.

Posted 7 Years Ago


tanaya

7 Years Ago

Hahaha thats funny though because after all my father has done I still love him and still stand by h.. read more
ATG

7 Years Ago

Yeah, love is funny that way. Someone can cause us so much pain and yet we still love them.
tanaya

7 Years Ago

So true...
Happiness....Why don't you get you already have it, but when all you see is across the fence...why be so farsighted.

I like that you express you're feelings and that for the time you take to write you aren't doing anything negative. But, for your own sake, I know you have those things weighing on your HEART, but that doesn't have to slow your mind and funnel your sight. Death is not an answer, it's a promise of extinction. It's not a last resort, it's a way of life that comes NATURALLY, not saying you exactly mean that here, but please...open your eyes.

I only care.

Posted 7 Years Ago


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KT
Very touching and emotional. I can only say do not end it all, because you are so much stronger than the abusers. Sometimes life and the people in it get us down, but we can show them that we are stronger and better than that. Great write, and I hope to read more from you. :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Life isn't easy for the most of us. I saw abuse throughout my childhood. Taught me to be kind and gentle. We can learn from bad examples. Don't end it all. Learn from the pain and hurt. Become a better person then the poor teachers. Thank you for the excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 7 Years Ago


Im sorrry but I just couldn't read the whole thing it was too emotional for me, but I did really enjoy what i did read because it was so heart breaking but true of what so many people deal with


Posted 7 Years Ago


nice that an exquisite peace i loved it please keep writing i would love to read and comment on ur poems very good

Posted 7 Years Ago


You have become one of my favorite reads. Your pain is so raw but you are able to control it within a few lines. Lines packed full of your pain. Keep writing and writing. You have the soul of a poet... and it is the pain that makes your words so strong and readable. Hard to read, but full of your truth. Do NOT quit writing. It could very well be the thing which saves your life. and through which you find your beauty. There is a wealth of beauty in you... you must see a tiny bit. Otherwise you would not thrown your strong words down like a gauntlet. Do not stop writing T.
S

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on April 26, 2012
Last Updated on April 26, 2012

Author

tanaya
tanaya

Wyoming, NSW, Australia



About
Hi! My name is Tanaya Smith :) Pleased to meet your acquaintance :) I am 16 in year 11. I live in Australia. My natural hair colour is blonde but there were to many sterotypes along .. more..

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