I Should Not Be Happy

I Should Not Be Happy

A Poem by Blue Ivory

I Should Not Be Happy

 


 

You taught me how to smile

All I wanted was to choke

I once cried in the arms of another

And then I was shamed for it.

 

I used to want to be the happiest

I’m now the one to make everyone’s day

I guess this is why women are complicated

But I miss being able to cry…

 

I suppose it is better than

Back when I couldn’t even feel

But sometimes all this laughter is sickening

Especially knowing that it’s finally genuine

 

Why does an artist have to be born crazy?

Do we ever get to win?

I feel the one who cries more wins the race

And midway my engine’s stopped

 

I suppose I could go back to writing about my beliefs

But I have fear of falling, I have fear of faith

I fear having some meaning in life

 

Perhaps I should just enjoy the sun rays

Maybe I’m just not used to having a lightweight soul

I just can’t shake the feeling off that something is wrong…

© 2014 Blue Ivory


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Featured Review

I've read a little bit about the brain and how it works. Many researchers are finding that much of what we see as emotions are not something coming from our 'self', in fact 'self' is actually an illusion we maintain, but often out of place emotions are chemical imbalances.

Personally, I cling to the belief I am in control even if the 'I' I think of is simply a conglomerate consensus of the various parts of my brain.

I search for BALANCE, and discovered that ,for me anyway, it lies in the direction of the awareness of the enormity of the Universe and how my spark in it may not be so important as to be something to anguish over. Thank you for sparking my thoughts with your wonderful work here.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Blue Ivory

9 Years Ago

This is actually pretty helpful! Thank you for the insight :)



Reviews

It is beginning with amazing flow and it ends perfectly. Beautiful write dear.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I love your raw truth being shared here. You tap so well into the feelings of so many. Excellent write..xo

Posted 9 Years Ago


"Artists are born crazy" reminds me of "geniuses are mad." So? Sanity and mediocrity are boring. Let's rather be mad and crazy than dull and lifeless.

Love the last two stanzas.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Artist types can have peculiar temperaments. That's for sure.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The title caught my attention . Such a nice and natural flow of thoughts. I would be looking forward to read more of such pieces :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


Blue Ivory

9 Years Ago

Thank you :)
Well constructed and rendered.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I've read a little bit about the brain and how it works. Many researchers are finding that much of what we see as emotions are not something coming from our 'self', in fact 'self' is actually an illusion we maintain, but often out of place emotions are chemical imbalances.

Personally, I cling to the belief I am in control even if the 'I' I think of is simply a conglomerate consensus of the various parts of my brain.

I search for BALANCE, and discovered that ,for me anyway, it lies in the direction of the awareness of the enormity of the Universe and how my spark in it may not be so important as to be something to anguish over. Thank you for sparking my thoughts with your wonderful work here.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Blue Ivory

9 Years Ago

This is actually pretty helpful! Thank you for the insight :)
I like the message here. I've felt that way before... Nicely penned ^-^
-QuanaWana

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Blue Ivory

9 Years Ago

Thank youuuuu! :D
Be happy as you deserve to be. Just think that way- happiness is there for you. Cheers!

Posted 9 Years Ago


and you should be happy with this..

Posted 9 Years Ago



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Added on May 27, 2014
Last Updated on May 27, 2014

Author

Blue Ivory
Blue Ivory

Dhaka, Bangladesh



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