(The Parlour) Cold Light.

(The Parlour) Cold Light.

A Poem by John Holmes

You see them as surly 
as you see the stars
Shinning Down
Upon the dark tarmac Road
Lights rushing on by 
as you cross the cold desert 
Lights rushing on by 
You can't help but be 
enchanted, enthralled
addicted to that glamour less light 
so Cold, So remote 
and yet 
the only company 
you will ever desire
In this cold desert 
that light strikes you 
as deeply as do there eyes
those eyes
that sing of glamour 
and... well
Do i need say anymore?
You're already smiling 
Smiling at that cold light 
knowing full well 
what it is 

© 2014 John Holmes

My Review

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The many different lines you started without complete thoughts startled me. It created unnecessary pause in my mind and my mind was all over the place. If you had read this out loud, your audience would be confused as well. I know some people like short and sweet, but these kinds of poems do not make sense to me. I'm sorry.

Posted 9 Years Ago

I like the visual your poem paints, and can almost see the lights in the distance.

"Surly" or "Surely"
I think "road" feels superfluous in "tarmac road"
"there eyes" or "their eyes"

Posted 9 Years Ago

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2 Reviews
Added on August 30, 2014
Last Updated on August 30, 2014
Tags: cold, light, desert, life, love, chance, beauty, company


John Holmes
John Holmes

United Kingdom

Okay SO I am back everybody! Sorry for the long lapse in maintaining this account. I hope you're all well. Currently I stand at zero read requests, I came back to have far too many for me to ever catc.. more..

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