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The State of Me

The State of Me

A Poem by The Uncommon Muse
"

written after a stunning betrayal by a man I thought I knew

"

Numb,

Is what my mind is

 

Broken,

Is what my heart is

 

Black,

Is what my soul is

 

Dead

Is what my love is

 

Gone,

Is what my hope is

 

 

 

© 2011 The Uncommon Muse


Author's Note

The Uncommon Muse
I question lightly whether thhis is finished or needs something more, but at the same time, it is simply an expression of the pain I felt.

My Review

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Reviews

I don't think this needs anything more adding to it, it's perfect the way it is. Its stark and full of raw emotion. Beautiful

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The Uncommon Muse

7 Years Ago

tank you...as I read it I do have to agree...I think the piece is perfect the way it is. Thank you .. read more
I have to say it is finished. It tells the whole story, I think.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The Uncommon Muse

7 Years Ago

TY...as I re-read it I have to agree. I think adding anything would only take away from the emotion.. read more
Justaguy

7 Years Ago

Take away and lessen the impact, I think
I don't really think there's anything subtle about it. The message is clear, and the feelings (or lack of) is made quite clear as well. With ever first word describing how the person feels I can imagine a stab going along with it. This piece drips with poison and seems like the writer is on the path to bitterness and hate.

Posted 10 Years Ago


a subtle yet straight to the point piece full of heartbreak and emotion

Posted 10 Years Ago


Very well expressed. Simple and to the point.

Posted 10 Years Ago


An equally astounding explanation of your pain, so well said. It's perfect as it is, because it's what you felt when you wrote it. you change it and it loses it's originality and realism.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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332 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 31, 2011
Last Updated on January 31, 2011

Author

The Uncommon Muse
The Uncommon Muse

Tallahassee, FL



About
I'm a writer focusing on erotica, fiction and poetry. I love creating characters and breathing life into them. I rarely write poetry just to write poetry. My poetry is intensely personal and is wri.. more..

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