Goodbyes

It's rough and raw, but I needed to write it

That day came
Sooner than expected
To say goodbye
Was so much harder
All the anger and the spite
Made me scared
That if I was there
Then you would not have left
It is better that you believe
Believe I hated you
Because then you could move on
For the truth is more real
I cared so much
I couldn't stop
Even when the yelling came
Then the crying and cursing
I still cared
You could never believe that I cared
Goodbye was too final
I needed to say more
But it was not to be
Please live well
And be you
The only you that you can be

Author's Note

It's rough, I'm sorry

Reviews

[alanwgraham]

Very honest and breaking up can be so hard!
Well done! I really prefer writing from the heart like this!
Regards, Alan
Would you like to check out my poem 'The gardener' - a bit of black humour!

[Unknown Poet]

Very touching ,
I touched my heart...
"That day came
Sooner than expected
To say goodbye
Was so much harder
All the anger and the spite
Made me scared
That if I was there
Then you would not have left "

[Aventicus]

I've been told that reading others' writing can help to improve one's own. This is a good start. Taking a theme that you understand easily enough and then giving structure to it via words. A major component is the presentation of those words. You must ensure that your thoughts and emotions are able to be understood by your readers. You have certainly done that here. Keep at it, and you will definitely improve. Also, I've heard that music is a good medium for inspiration.

[t.m.]

It's not rough. It's meaningful. Although you should explain it

[Jessica]

How should it be explained?

[t.m.]

Why line 4 5 6 8 9 10 11 12 and that you needed to say more.

[Jessica]

I felt like the person who I wrote it for never believed I cared about her. I thought that if she thought I hated her then maybe she could move on and be able to leave. It hurt to not be there for her, but I thought it would be easier for her. I always cared and never wanted her to be hurt by it.

[Jessica]

Sorry, that was a long explanation. Did it make sense?

[t.m.]

It hurt her so much more. What was the more you wanted to tell her?

[Jessica]

How do you know? Just that I believe in her and she is so powerful and amazing. She can change lives. I wish she knew how much I cared

[t.m.]

How much did you care?

[Jessica]

A lot. I don't think she'll ever know or believe it. I cared about everything and someone of the stuff she told me broke my heart

[t.m.]

She cared about you, too, you know. A lot. That makes me wonder about lines 12 13 14 though. Can ok n them?

[Jessica]

I did care a lot and I still do. Can you OK them?

[t.m.]

I meant explain. I apologize.

[Jessica]

Even though there were rough times I didn't stop caring, but she is strong enough to face life now.

[Jessica]

She just never believed people cared about her

[t.m.]

For the truth is more real confuses me

[Jessica]

For the truth is more real: she alwaysbelieved that I hated her,but the real truth is that I cared about her and want her to do well.

[t.m.]

But you didn't say goodbye to her? Do you think she feels like she meant little to both in to you now? You say she believed you hated her but in dont think it was always that way.

[Jessica]

I tried to say goodbye in a letter. I couldn't come back to say say goodbye to her because it would have made it worse.

[Jessica]

I did write a letter to her

[t.m.]

how would it have made it worse?

[Jessica]

I thought it would.

[Jessica]

I don't know, I get stiluck in my head sometimes

[t.m.]

Im sorry. I do it too. You should definitely write more.

[Jessica]

I'm sorry too, it was a lot of explaining. I think I will

[t.m.]

I like explanations, so don't worry about it. I look forward to seeing more of your work on here. I think I might post something soon

[t.m.]

I'm going to cry.

[Jessica]

Why do you want to cry?

[t.m.]

Because so much is so wrong but I'm pretending everything isbokay and I want to fix it and I want you to know I never hated you a dB I do trust you.

[Jessica]

I do know that. Your the one that never knew that.

[t.m.]

Knew what?

[Jessica]

You never knew that I didn't hate you.

[t.m.]

I know. Now, anyway. I had a long talk with a friend and realized it.

[Jessica]

Im glad you did :)

[t.m.]

I don't know. You might not be if you knew. But thank you for being there for me. I know you didn't hate me because you never would've kept talking to me after the hospital incident if you did. You never would have let me keep the coin. You never would have listened to all the times I yelled at you. You never would have listened to me when I told you to call your mom for your inhaler.

[Jessica]

What friend was it?

[t.m.]

No one that we mutually kbow. Why?

[Jessica]

You said I wouldn't be glad if I knew

[t.m.]

It's not Dylan. I promise.

[Jessica]

That's OK, I'm glad they helped

[t.m.]

You wouldn't be. I'm glad I thought fr a while though

[Jessica]

I wouldn't be?

[t.m.]

Probably not. But i don't think you'd be happy with a lot of my current choices

[Jessica]

We all make choices. Some good some bad

[t.m.]

Why are you so like that

[Jessica]

Because I am

[t.m.]

You're so...vague and nice and just. Ugh. Be less perfect.

[t.m.]

Erica too. She's stuck around even though all I do is knplain.

[Jessica]

I'm not perfect. Nobody is

[t.m.]

Lies and deceit

[t.m.]

Actually that is a lie. Whoever created the white tree sculpture is perfect.

[Jessica]

Agreed. I was going to head to the sculpture park

[t.m.]

I'll leave so you can go. I just had to start at least one sketch. The commission is due Friday and I just started.

[Jessica]

Don't leave, it is a public place. I just woke up lol

[t.m.]

Yeah, well. It's cold. Just a warning.

[Jessica]

The rainbow thing is one of my favorites

[t.m.]

If only it weren't so muddy right now. Why the rainbow thing?

[Jessica]

I like the colors and I just think it's a cool sculpture.

[t.m.]

That's understandable. It's really cool at certain times of day, with the sunlight.

[Jessica]

That is one of the reasons why I really like it

[t.m.]

I'd say great minds think alike, but my mind is not so great.

[Jessica]

It's okay neither is mine

[t.m.]

Why is that?

[Jessica]

LOL I am not the brightest person ever, but it is ok

[t.m.]

Oh my gosh. Stop insulting yourself.

[t.m.]

Could you please not lie next time and actually respond?