Temptation

Originally a piece of spoken word.

When I was four, I was brave.

I was a loud, outspoken child who

believed that she could save anyone with

her toy doll doctor skills.

She lived for the thrills of parks and trips

with mom and dad to places unseen.

She had no fears and shed no tears for

she was clever and didn't have to worry

about being bottom of the class.

She grew as a person, like a blade of

uncut grass who wanted to change the world.

And no one could stop her.

From age seven to age eleven, her world

was polluted by a convoluted girl who

was stick thin, manipulative and one

of the biggest b*****s to ever live. She 

bullied her into insecurities, worries

and moralities because chubby would

not cut it.

The 'f' word became a big part of her life,

although it had a worse meaning than 

'f**k', 'f****t' or 'freak', though

the latter was commonly used.

F stood for F A T.

This three letter word caused her more

pain than any four, five or six letter words.

It labelled her in a category she shouldn't

have been in.

It gave her a reason to catch a ride on 

the nearest downwards spiral which

would land her on a grey, dirty sofa

in a council therapy office.

In her early teens she was both

D I A G N O S E D

and 

G I V I N G  U P

.

She gave up hope and succumbed to

her pain.

temptation.

Temptation.

TEMPTATION.

She gave in to the temptation

of pain removal by causing the world

around her pain.

She held on to her past whilst severing her

future and preparing herself for whatever

else was going to come her way.

The sharp knife of hope carved the skin of the

past.

It bled pain and agony, and release.

The plaster sealed her, pain and agony

free.

The scars remind her of where she released pain.

Now her arms are tattooed with reminders

of a past that couldn't have left fast

enough.

A family torn apart by a death of a

person physically and another mentally.

She wanted to make it all go away.

Relieve others of her burden.

September 20th 2016.

That was meant to be engraved on

her headstone.

As she prepared to journey for

the final time, a simple message from

someone she'd never met saved her.

That's how a stranger saved her life.

The stranger intrigued her, but also made

her feel loved. And since, she hasn't

succumbed to the temptation of the journey.

This is a message to all those people

who grew up surrounded by temptation.

Who were always deemed as overreacting.

Who have succumbed, who are planning to.

Or who feel they will.

You are not alone.

Although society has a way of condemning

the weak, it has survived thus far.

Because there are enough similar

people to keep the world going around

The scars are a mark of bravery,

not silliness or stupidity.

The pain is not subjective, it is seemingly

everlasting.

Don't be afraid, someone will save you. I know

this is hard to believe and fathom

but there is definitely someone.

Even me.

I was saved by a stranger.

And now I'll save you.

Author's Note

honest reviews please :)

Reviews

[aj milton]

Wow, a very thought provoking description of a descent through quite a catalogue of pressures and conditions to the point of suicide. Using the word temptation makes it so much more powerful and personal.

And then the rise out of the abyss bringing hope and the humanity of concern for others. Such a great counterpoint.

The only thing I miss is quite how the stranger appeared at that crucial time.

[TwoDaysTooLate]

thank you so so much for your review!
i do agree - the stranger appearing is a bit out of place but i'll try and fix it for another poem in the future :)