Cutting the Stalllion

Short story of man recently out of prison, living in a half-way house, where he has to work for a local veterinary clinic. He is presented with a demoralizing task which feels torn about.

I was waiting out by the bus stop by the local airport with Dale, for Doc Golber to pick us up for our first day of work out at the Vet clinic.  I wasn't sure what he would want us to do for odd jobs.  Didn't really care.

             Of course he was late to pick us up............

            Doc Golber finally pulled up in a full size truck pulling half a load of cattle in a trailer. " He said this is my daughter’s 4H project.  Sorry there isn’t enough room in the cab. Yer a going to have tah ride in the back half of the trailer. There is only a half load so y’all have the whole back half all to your selves." It was an extended cab pickup that probably had room in the back seats, but he probably knew Dale is a registered sex offender.  It saved him at least 20 minutes of awkward small talk with 2 felons.

            Ya never realize what a suspension does for your typical motor vehicle until you ride in a livestock trailer that doesn't have any. I wasn't sure wither to keep my legs straight to see up through the panel outside or bent to absorb the shock. It would just be nice to look ahead and see when the bumps and dips where going to come. I decided to see how the cows dealt with it. It seemed like the young ones bounced back and forth trying to anticipate the next jar, but there seems to be no rhythm or pattern to the topography of a two lane country road. The older cow seemed just stare forward numbly adjusting herself appropriately as if saying "aww hellwit it anyway" as the young ones bumped into her. I thought that may be the best idea.  The only thing we could tell about the outside world was feel of the terrain beneath us was pavement, gravel, dirt, and finally a driveway.

            Doc came round the back of the trailer to let us out. "Sorry" he said. "It musta been a bumpy ride, but it must be good to get out the half-way house."  

            Which it was. It's always just... GREATTT to work for someone that insists they are just doing you a favor, by allowing you a chance to work amongst compulsively industrious men, such as themselves.

            Most temp agriculture jobs ya have to work for people that assume that since you're a former junkie and all you'd have a weak stomach for the un-pleasantries of the business. But as a junkie I figured I seen some pretty unpleasant, gnarly sights and smells. One just had to acquaint oneself to the unique un-pleasantries of the assignment. But oh, how the old farmers'd get a chuckle out seeing my stomach turn as they'd watch me toil, saying: " Was da matter boy?! You ain't never seen/touched/smelled no dead possum, or hog placenta, etc, etc.,,,,l"  This I was ready for.   

            We mowed the grass around the clinic, painted the trim on the building, scooped s**t and other animal byproducts. Which was fine the only thing demeaning was standing around waiting  for Maa and Paa Kettle to think of more disheartening tediously mindless tasks. 

When they hear you have a history of substance abuse they naturally assume that you’re just a lazy b*****d.  If you've participated in criminal acts, then surely you must just have a fundamentally poor work ethic.   However I have worked jobs in the past with such dedication and fervor that make a lesser man’s eyes bleed. Even awful, back breaking, s****y jobs, and still asked for more.  Until I had enough money to get high again. Then well,,,,,, then it was time to find another job.  Of course `Ma an Paa didn't know or care about that, an I guess they since that part of my life is over it didn't really matter. 

            After a week Dale wasn't working there anymore. He really was already gone before he even started in Doc’s opinion to tell ya the truth. Strangely I wasn’t really any busier with him gone and Doc sure seemed happier that he only had to make-up ½ as many degrading tasks in a day.

I oddly missed having Dale to talk AT me, though I didn't think I would.  Always thought I’d bust his skull one for day all of his creepy matters in which he would relentlessly inform me of in great detail. I never really understood if Dale truly thought he had an enlightened perspective that he just had to share with anyone that would listen, or he just got off on making people feel uncomfortable. Of course he always interpreted me not telling him to “shut the f**k up” as “oh my! Do tell me more.” Yet somehow hearing my lonely shovel scraping on the concrete floor made me wish he was here to irritate me once more during the monotony of the day. 

            I had met a women at the narcotics anonymous. She was nice, we had stuff in common, ya know, like trying to get clean an all because we had to, and pretending like it was because we wanted to. She was just cool. Not overbearingly cool. That always seems fishy from people at the NA meetings because being easy to talk to can lure you into a leaking information you don’t want your PO to hearing through the grapevine (it is supposed to anonymous, but this town is to damn small) or worse yet you can get trapped in a long depressing tragic monologue of someone's life. This girl didn't seem like either of those and I felt fortunate enough to have met her. 

            One day I had a 4 hour furlough from the house, and we were going to meet do something constructive tonight together.  I didn’t care whether we going to make out in her apartment or walk around in Wal-mart and compare specials on Cap’n Crunch. I was thrilled. So I was just wrapping up my chores with a pep in my step. Then Maa Golber got a call from Ms. Thrasher saying she was just now loading her two horse colts the she was supposed to bring in at 2 in the afternoon to be cut. Being it was 3:30 and she just leaving I wasn’t optimistic about getting done on time.

            “Well” Doc said I can’t run ya in til I do this. So why don’t take a break for a while. You look like you could use a break an go walk around the pond a bit an we’ll call you back over when they get here.  You probably want some time with your thoughts I'm sure.”

            Oh great, I see you ain’t gonna pay me for an hour waiting around.  An a walk would be good for me around your lovely conservative well maintained property.  I get you Paa! I get you.  For you going for a walk and singing “She’ll Be Coming Around the Mountain When She Comes" is now you get your kicks.  While I just inject battery acid in my veins and commit unholy acts for recreation. Worst of all I only have 2 cigarettes, an who know when horse lady’ll come round. “GOD! Any day, but today!” I thought. Whatever anyway….. I was askin Doc.........

            “So what are we doing with the the horses Doc?”

            “Geld them I said. You don’t know what that is. Ohhh crimeney who am I working with here. It’s Castration. Crimney what do they teach you kids in school now a days."

            "I'm sorry. I most have cut class on the horse castration topic day.....Sir."  A little bit of smart assy-ness that I have been trying so hard to hold in slipped out of me there unintentionally.  I hoped this would at least slow down the "What do they teach you in school now a-days?" bit.  I thought "I am sure you can think of more creative insulting things to say, Doc. You're a smart guy don't be lazy."   

            " Yeah....well just go on...An I'll call you when its time." 

            Ms. Thrasher's rickity ride tugged up the Golber vet clinic drive in untimely fashion. I fumbled through an ad-hoc system of rope, twine, and bent levers to open the trailer door.  I asked Ms. Thrasher about the horses to distract her from my inadequacy of not being able to open a simple hillbilly rigged door.

            “Can you ride these here horses? How old are they?

            “About 2 years. Yeah they’re broke to ride enough for now, but can’t trust them on the trail. You just aren't able to tell. We gotta get them cut. They might get ornry”

            "Shouldn't you just see how he acts as he gets older?  Why do you absolutely, no questions asked need to castrate them?” Can't you trust them until they show signs of getting "Ornry". 

            “Because they’re starting to get hair in funny and thinking about girls. What do the they teach you kids in school these days.” Doc interrupted as he walked outside briskly carrying a bucket in one hand, a lead rope and canvas in the other. “Here take these. Let’s get the show on the road.”

            "He's right dear." Ms. Thrasher reinforced "It's just in their nature.  We don't take such chances. You just have to."

            Doc loaded up a shot of tranquilizer to give the first horse.

            "That little thing is really going to put this whole horse down."  I asked.

            "He''ll go down for a bit, but he'll still be awake. That's why I need YOU to hold him, and hold him good. I better not get kicked."

            "Well is that a just a sedative or anesthesia. Is it going to be enough?"

            " This stuff. Heh. You take some of this stuff you'll be set for a weekend just watching television and chewing on your tongue. There isn't going to be any "extra" an the rest I keep GOOD and locked up. Don't worry"

             " I wasn't talking about for people. I just wanted to know if it'll hurt him real bad."

            "Oh he'll feel something alright, but he'll get over it. Now come on it getting dark. While we're young criminey."      

            The first horse went down pretty quickly. Doc was obviously irritated with my inept animal handling skill. He seemed to hold it in well somewhat however. Perhaps in order to concentrate on make the incisions he had to divert power from being such a passive aggressive a*****e.  He only told me to make sure I pressed my knee harder into the black horses neck, which I was reluctant to do. So it seems the procedure was to place my weight on his neck below his jaw while holding a rope taught that plainly ran from the halter on his head and wrapped around his rear leg that wasn't on the ground, pulled up and clear of Doc while he performed his awful deed.  Since the rope was lead through attaching his head to his leg the horse couldn’t kick without pulling his head with his head down. It was a pretty smart idea really, for as awful of as the whole thing is and all.

             The black horse grunted the whole time like an old man moving furniture.  

            "If he starts to fight it’s already too late.  You need to pin him so he feels there isn't a even a possibility of starting to fight back. He's a 1,000 pound animal don't forget that" Doc lectured."

            It seemed easy enough. I thought Doc was totally making it seem harder than it had to be.  I soon found out that the black horse was just an easy one. He didn't hardly fight.  At least compared to "Cowboy", the next to be done.

            Even though the drugs were starting to take effect in Cowboy, he saw the operation on his pasture mate and made a strong conscientious decision that he would have none of it.

            Doc tried to pull him down on the ground. I kept trying to help Doc, but I always seemed to be in the wrong place and in his way.

            Doc growled "Come on! Go down you son of a b***h. Go down!!" As he grabbed his ear and walked him in circles to break down his base. Cowboy was still resilient as wobbled like  a boxer in the 12 round that was pretty sure he was going to lose the fight, but wasn't about to be "knocked out" and wasn't giving the victor any easy W.

            "Ahh hell with it." Doc said as he gave Cowboy another shot.

            This was enough to get him down on the ground and tie him up somewhat.  Cowboy still breathed heavily and was incredibly tense.  

Cowboy still wouldn't lay on his side though.  Doc told me if I let him up again it would speed up the sedative's effect. So Cowboy got up again, wobbled and tipped over hard like a sedated domino. It appeared as if Cowboy's rebellion was over.  We cinched him up and Doc went to work.

            Cowboy's eyes still remanded ever vigilante although the rest of his body seemed to be failing him. He must wonder of all the times he has stood up and not fallen down, why was this time so tragically different. I thought about Cowboy's resolve and admired him. As my mind wandered I allowed slack in the line. 

            Cowboy’s leg came free. He was apparently getting his second wind as he worked the sedatives though his system. "Go man Go!!" I thought! "Don't let them take this from you. F**k these people!!" I said to Cowboy with my eyes as I had my knee on his neck.  Doc Golber snarled "D****t you stupid druggie put the rope back on his foot if he kicks me...!”" Oh no do tell me how you really feel Mr. Doc Golber Sir. 

I betrayed Cowboy as soon as heard Doc. I rapped that rope back on Cowboy’s foot and hoisted it up so Doc could finish his gruesome task.

            As Cowboy’s sedatives were wearing off he sat up and pawed his right hoof on the ground in an attempt gather himself to stand. He groaned as his strength escaped him and wondered what was missing. He wasn't sure if he should feel angry or despondent

            And it was me that helped it all happen Cowboy. It was me that sold out a fellow young stallion that couldn't be allowed in his society without certain checks and restraints.  I made a decision that didn't want to be part of your gelding, and then betrayed that decision instantly. All it took was a grumpy old vet to snarl at me.  

            Cowboy seemed to want to get this whole ordeal over with as well. He climbed into the trailer with a precariousness he had never saw necessary before.

            Ms. Thresher offered to me

            "It must have been a long day for you, dear. Why don't you jump in the truck, and I'll take you back into town? There is a couple cans of pop in there if you want some."   

            "Aaah. Nehh. No thanks Mrs. Thresher I'll just ride in the back of the trailer. I appreciate it though."

 

 

Author's Note

Is there a recognizable similarities/differences between the horse and the main character? Thanks for reading. I appreciate your time!!!

Reviews

[lee von cleef]

Pinched between the fence and the gate, cotton rope hiking one hind leg forward,Head dallied off hard and fast,Lip chain in hand, Sharp Case knife splits the sack quick,twice, dig deep get the "squealer "Too!,Then the sound,hard to reproduce on paper, but like cutting through the ribs you won't forget it Some Buddie should of spoke up, Emasculater's strong just part of a woman's nature .

[Colt 45 & 9/16]

I like your description better. Can I steal it and say its mine?

[Colt 45 & 9/16]

Waida min!!!!!! That's your "Bliss and the Roan" Poem. You tricked ME!!!

[lee von cleef]

No you inspired me, to write about marriage,Adam and Eve,(She did it)and apples, their effects, P S the Old Mares Ribs, I herd the vet cutting through a old mares ribs to see why she died, bad sound, I just wanted it in a poem but could not duplicate it so like Diego said I left it to the readers own imagination.If you get a chance re-read Bliss and the Roan

[Michael Stevens]

Any story that has a character named Doc Golber in it is a winner; and this fabulous story sure does qualify s a winner!