Serenity

Serenity

A Poem by UnderINK
"

Inspired by Russian deforestation originally, but it really has to do with general human disregard for nature. Pollution, tearing down historical sites, cutting down forests, global warming.

"
An amber sky melts beyond the clouds,
A sea of black lies infinite in its path,
Folds of dark velvet drape lovingly
Over the glimmering moon.
Leaves of mighty oak and slender birch
Fly boundless past the praying stars,
While emerald walls and fallen towers
Watch over these ancient woods.
Eyes of rich umber, scarred and burned,
Tell tales of wars fought long ago
When this ground was far too young
Even for the crumbling rotten logs.
In silence, dark and frigid waters pass
The resting willow weeping here,
Like blood from the wounds of men,
And drift beneath the waking forest.
Screams of hunting and hunted
Linger over forgotten bones,
While nightingales twitter softly
In the shadows of the wind.
Tonight, the world that man has built
Will slumber gently with no regret.
But the one they have destroyed
Shall never sleep.

© 2010 UnderINK


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Reviews

interesting write and ending you nail brilliantly!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Like I said before, this is absolutely a gorgeous piece, despite the thing that prompted it. Thank you so much for entering my contest, Congratulations.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


OMG, absolutely beautiful. This is exactly what I was wanting in my imagery contest; you have definately made the first cut of finalists.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


Im not really much for poetry but I do know I when I read one I like and that was a nice piece, one thing that sticks out to me is the last part

"Tonight, the world that man has built
Will slumber gently with no regret.
But the one they have destroyed
Shall never sleep."

Nice way to sum it up, you really knocked it outta the park :)

Also I like how early in your poem you use colors to describe but then you stop as if to add to the destruction of nature, bleeding it of its beauty, like taking a Van Gogh painting and stripping it of color, sure its still art but not quite the same.


This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


Powerful in your portrayal of beauty and desolation, living together in a fragmented world. Your imagery is rich in its profound expression of life and death wrestling for the world. Amazing...

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


the imagery in this is absolutely gorgeous and it has a deep meaning. i love it.
my only suggestion is that it be broken into stanzas, to polish it up and make it easier to read. other than that, however, i think this is a beautiful piece.

thank you for entering it in my contest, and good luck.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I love every word, the meaning, the message, the way it flowed, outstanding visuals
nice work
thank you for entering my contest

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is beautiful to me. I found myself in the poem, there in the woods, seeing the past and mourning it. Good job!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


You've got an extremely powerful styling here that allows the reader to create a great mental visual. "Leaves of mighty oak and slender birch / Fly boundless past the praying stars, While emerald walls and fallen towers / Watch over these ancient woods." You give a fantastic sense of majesty and personality to the natural world, one that few too many people recognize and respect in this day and age.
Thank you for sharing.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on February 8, 2008
Last Updated on July 19, 2010
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Author

UnderINK
UnderINK

Greenville, PA



About
Hi. I'm a writer. Obviously. I'm twenty years old and have Asperger's Syndrome, so I am not always the best at having conversations--- but I love to anyway. So if you can tolerate my awkwardness, d.. more..

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