Revolution

Revolution

A Story by Reba B.
"

The place becomes overrun with invaders, and the only way to get their freedom is revolution. But will they get freedom or detention?

"

    

     The seniors led the army of high schoolers whose school was overrun by tiny vermin. The pests were smaller than they had expected, but their numbers cast an affect on the school.

 

     "We can't have our school be slowly taken over by these creatures! The presense of them has changed our educational haven into a prison!" one of the seniors yelled. A cheer came from the followers who surrounded the stage. "They destroyed the personal painted murals across the school yet they say they try to make this less like an institute! They planted one sullen tree in the midst of our school and they think THAT makes it less like an institute?! Lies! It's all for show! Their leaders exile us from OUR cafateria, well I say 'No!'" More cheers followed the speech.

 

     A girl sniffled, walking into the crowd, "What's going on?"

 

     "Where have you been? Our school is getting taken away from us!"

 

     "I've been sick for a while- what do you mean 'taken'?" she questioned.

 

     "Well it all started when the Board merged the middle school with ours. Then stopped us from going on their side of the building. Next thing we know things are getting out of hand: They banish us from the cafateria when we are in there, so that their creatures can feed during what they have named 'nutrition break', they've changed our school to look like an impersonal institution and now they've begun to swarm our side and we lose less room to stand each day!" The crowd roared around them as the senior on stage finished his inspiring speech.

 

     The sick girl trembled as the whole high school body marched out of the gymnasium, their armour and weapons all utensils from the foods room. "We're going to war?!" she squeked.

 

     "No," the boy answered, "This is a revolution!" Thusly, he got into place and marched with his peers into territory unknown.

 

     The girl was now alone in the gym and all was silent. Minutes past (or atleast what seemed like minutes) before even a sound could be heard. Then it happened. A large bang sounded the fight and she rushed out to see what had occured in the onslaught, as the smell of blown out candles hovered the halls.

 

     The chemistry students had concocted chemical bombs and they were tossed across the long hallway at the invasion by the lacross players. Their eye goggles gleamed from the light of the explosion. The body of the invasion squirmed and screeched. There was not a single person, just one oppositional being.

 

     The Artisans dashed to the frontlines, tossing buckets of paint at their beady eyes, blinding the front attackers. The sports players took their equipment; the hockey sticks, softball bats, soccer balls, and tennis rackets and they clashed with the being infront of their eyes.

 

     The girl watched in amazement and swore she could hear the clashing of swords and sheilds. The space around her became dark, as a shadowy presense hung over her. Her petit body shook and turned slowly in reluctance. Above her stood a tall, thin man; his greasy, black combover glimmered under the rays of the schools lights.

 

     He peered at her over his glasses, "You must leave the cafeteria area!!" His voice otherwise would've been mousy, annoying and lecturous, but to her - today - seemed to boom and rattle the earth. It was their leader.

 

     He swung his arms; dodging she flung herself backwards and swiftly ran to the highschool army. "The VP is attacking from behind!!" she screamed to the otherwise unsuspecting group.

 

     Several students attacked, but he was too powerful, no one could take him down. He swung his arms, knocking the students to the ground; "DETENTION" stamped on their foreheads. They were paralyzed and their eyes were wide open, unblinking.

 

     The rest of the seniors' attacks were occupied with the oncoming invasion. The girl was between the large monster and her fellow students. What could she do though? Her heart sank as the VP came closer and closer. She could picture herself on the ground, "DETENTION" written across her forehead. She never had a detention before, the mere thought shook her to the bone. She closed her eyes as the anticipation of the detention grew.

 

     But nothing happened.

 

     She opened her eyes to see a mysterious hooded man fighting the VP beast. He held a suitcase as his weapon, and he smoothly dodged the attacks. Who was this mysterious boy? His suitcase hit with each swing he took. The VP roared in pain and tried to grab him, but the boy rolled behind the VP and did an uppercut with the suitcase. It's hinges scrapped across the leader's back and he let out a yelp. The mysterious boy jumped up and landed on the shoulders of the attacker, keeping his grip on the tacky stripped red and yellow tie he fashioned.

 

     "Arrivederci," the boy cooly said and the case smaked into the back of the VP's head. Watching him fall to the tiled floor was unbearably slow. First he wavered, then a moan escaped his lips and his body was pulled to the earth. The sound of the fall reverberated through the hallway, and the small creatures retreated in terror.

 

     The revolution had ended.

 

     He unveiled his face; a pretty face she had never seen before. That face soon came close to her. She couldn't help but blush as the smooth Italian left his lips. 

 

     "Ciao," he said, "Are you alright?" Speaking to him would have came naturally, but the girl was so overwhelmed she could not answer. Instead, only a nod was her response. He smiled and strolled coyly out the door. There was cheering behind her; happy students celebrated their victory. The school could now return to normal.

 

     Suddenly, a feeling bubbled up inside the girl and she ran to the door. She saw the boy walking slowly into the distance, the suitcase hung over his sholder.

 

     Her hand was around her mouth, amplifying her voice, "Who are you?!"

 

     The boy turned his body leisurely to answer, "Exchange student," he winked. And so, the hero dissapeared in the distance; the suave Italian never to be seen again...


     ...well until Monday when classes started again.

 

 

 

Image

© 2011 Reba B.


Author's Note

Reba B.
A satirical take on a highschool that has grades 7 and 8's merge with the existing building.
*Edit: May 20/11* Fixed some errors, and added about the painted murals as suggested. Thank you for the comments everyone :)

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Featured Review

This made me laugh A LOT. Everyone's weapons were very clever, especially the vice president's being detentions haha! As soon as the girl didn't recognize the boy taking down the VP I was like, "It has to be an exchange student!".
The final line closes the story perfectly. While reading it, you feel like it's this huge dramatic war, but that line brings the story back to being hilarious. It's the last laugh haha.
I'm positive I know where your inspiration for this story came from. ;)
It's hilarious yet it still reveals the upset of having schools merge. I think you did a terrific job at satirical writing. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Well written, it was fun engaging and kept the reader's attention focused. I am curious if you didn't give her a name for a reason. Naming her might help break up some of those sentences so you are not constantly referring to her as, 'the girl'
I especially liked the end.
Hope this helps and keep writing.

Posted 11 Years Ago


This was hilarious. You should have mentioned the painting over murals/old classrooms! I was thinking when the hooded boy appeared that he was an exchange student. His ability? DIPLOMATIC DETENTION IMMUNITY!!! :p

I loved the special attacks that each type of student got, and the allusion to rats for the junior students. The final paragraph ends the story quite well, made me roll my eyes and laugh.

From an editor's point of view, you may want to re-read and check for some spelling errors, like the use of there instead of their (for example). The flow of the story is great and the action isn't lost in the explanation of the activities. Great job!

Posted 12 Years Ago


This made me laugh really hard since we talked about it with Mr. M! Just like what Kitko said, the weapons were hilarious especially the VP's, I was like 'Detention? Pfffttt that would never work!'
I could totally see this as like a short film though, when I read this I could just see everyone running towards the grade 7/8's side with like war paint on xD Total Brave Heart moment there.
Loved it though C:

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is probably one of the best pieces of satire i've read in a while, this is very smartly written. A part of me always wanted this to happen in school, something interesting would have happened. haha.
Nice work, adding to my favourites:)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This made me laugh A LOT. Everyone's weapons were very clever, especially the vice president's being detentions haha! As soon as the girl didn't recognize the boy taking down the VP I was like, "It has to be an exchange student!".
The final line closes the story perfectly. While reading it, you feel like it's this huge dramatic war, but that line brings the story back to being hilarious. It's the last laugh haha.
I'm positive I know where your inspiration for this story came from. ;)
It's hilarious yet it still reveals the upset of having schools merge. I think you did a terrific job at satirical writing. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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170 Views
5 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on February 27, 2011
Last Updated on May 20, 2011
Tags: school funny satire highschool r

Author

Reba B.
Reba B.

Canada



About
Hello, Right now I'm doing an ongoing series called aWACened (pronounced Awakened) about a guy named Lance who kinda has people problems and rather he play video games online than meet people. The sto.. more..

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