Tea Girl And Kettle Lad In: Figurine Frenzy

Tea Girl And Kettle Lad In: Figurine Frenzy

A Story by Nitsua

When a young boy is robbed from the key to his family's well being, it's up to Tea Girl And Kettle Lad to return it! But trouble isn't all that they will find in today's escapade.

Tea Girl And Kettle Lad In: Figure Frenzy

The birds sang as kids played and flowers bloomed on a peaceful spring day in Dortopolis. Everything was as it should be, except for one store on the corner of Russel Lane. Our story for today starts here.

" You have to understand, mam, that figurine is worth more than just money to me! Please give it back! " a young boy cried, his head just barely able to peek over the counter that he was apparently managing.

" Kyuhuhuhu " Laughed a woman, cloaked in head to toe in black, only her nose and mouth visible; " I am but a simple collector and this was in your store, so it MUST be for sale. Don't you know anything about this kind of stuff? " she snickered mockingly.

" Mam I'm just filling in for my parents while they recover from an illness! I have to keep that figure until the man who left it here can return to claim it. He pawned it while he was off on a business trip and the money he will pay to get this back will be enough to afford the medicine for my parent's illness! " Cried the boy.

" You little brat, in this world it's take or be stolen from, and I most desire this little beauty here for my collection! Now I'll be on my way, tata~ " The woman said in a sass filled tone, walking out of the store. A feather dropped from beneath her cloak.

The boy curled up in a ball and cried behind the counter, worrying for his parent's well being.

Several blocks down the road, our crime fighting heroine and her flamboyant side kick were taking a stroll through the town. Tea Girl enjoying the lovely weather out while Kettle Lad, you guessed it, was admiring the window displays on every shop they passed by.

" What a lovely day! A perfect opportunity for a walk, don't you think, Kettle Lad? " Tea Girl said, her eyes engulfed with soft fluffy clouds.

" What a lovely corset! I would give up chocolate for a month to fill it. Don't you think I would look great in it, Tea Girl? " Kettle Lad's pupils were simply heart symbols.

" No comment. " Tea Girl said, her usual rosey red cheeks just a tiny tad bit brighter at Kettle Lad's question.

" Hey Tea Girl, the clouds are nice and all but look over there" he said, pointing at an empty shop, he was far behind Tea Girl due to the fascination over the windows. Tea Girl pulled her eyes away from the beautiful sky and walked backwards for a bit, until she met up with Kettle Lad. He was pointing at a counter of a collectible figurine shop. The door was wide open and not a single soul to be seen. The crime rate in Dortopolis has been on the rise lately, and with so many valuable figures this concerned the duo. Walking together, they entered the shop and looked around.

Dozens upon dozens of figures lined the walls of the shop. From giant robots to bikini clad pop stars, the shop was truly an enthusiast's paradise.

" This is a really nice place! " Expressed Tea Girl, as she walked around the shop with her sidekick. " I'm really fond of the skeleton dolls "

" You're telling me girlfriend " Kettle Lad, who was equally amazed replied fabulously, his eyes more attached to the fabric on the figures as opposed to the wearers.

" My only complaint is the constant creaking the floor makes " She said, stopping to admire an action figure of one of her favorite characters, known as Chalk.

" I know right? They need renovations badly " the fancy man said, twirling side to side, his gown-like attire flowing in the store as he stood in place.

The creaking continued.

" It's a shame too, because the floor looks really well made." Our favorite heroine said, standing still as she examined a whale loving prince plushie.

" Indeed, the floor must be about to collapse, seeing how it isn't wood at all " the wise and all knowing Kettle Lad said, wondering how this sea shell bra on a red hair figure would look on him, too intrigued to take a step. " This phenomenon is more queer than me. The creaking itself sounds very weird as well… Very organic and sad and stuff"

" Isn't it?" Tea Girl, who was now sitting down on a stool with her feet dangling in the air said as she examined a blue haired boy and red hair girl couples figure set.

A woman cloaked in black, whose only features to be seen as her nose and mouth peaked out from behind the shop door and explained.

" Hey you 2, for plot progression sake, please look behind the counter, thanks and see you soon! Kyuhuhuhu " She dashed off in her high heels laughing up a storm, sacrificing her stamina and progression away from the scene of the crime to help our evil fighting masterminds out.

" Oh thank you! " the duncenamic duo said, putting the figures in their hands back in their rightful places as they walked towards the counter. " What a nice lady " they both, yet again said, locking pinkies as was custom when they said something at the same time.

To their shock, and everyone who reads this relief, they discovered that the creaking wasn't caused by the floor, but by a crying child curled up in the fetal position.

Tea Girl bent down and rubbed the boy's shoulder, his whimpering simmered down as she asked:

" Hey little guy, what's the matter? "

" My mom and dad are sick as someone took the key to their recovery " he cried

" We'll get the medicine back for you, can you describe what the person who took it looked like? " she said.

" It wasn't medicine, it was a very rare figurine. A Kawaii Titan golden statue. It's worth is beyond thought and there are only 3 in existence but I'd sell my soul to get it back. Not for it's worth, but because a man trusted me to keep it safe while he had errands to run and he would pay me enough to get the medicine for my momma and daddy. But he's going to get so mad when he learns that it's stolen and my parents are gonna… " the boy started crying hard again, Tea Girl trying to comfort him the best to her abilities while Kettle Lad examined his nails. Kettle Lad explained:

" Don't worry little one, we'll get it back for you, we are professional heroes. Now can you tell us what she looked like? Also, don't sell your soul for anything, you'll attract cat loving demons. " He joked in a calm, as less fabulous and easy to understand tone as possible.

" I'll try. She was wearing a black cloak and the only thing showing was her mouth and nose, she had a weird laugh too. It went Kyuhuhuhuhu." He tried his hardest to do the odd laugh.

At that moment, the duo looked at each other, then at the open door, then at the kid and both screamed, while locking pinkies:

" Are you kidding me right now? "

Tea Girl nodded at Kettle Lad to stay tight and keep the young boy company, she jumped over the desk, almost breaking her neck but landing the move successfully and ran out the door in search of the woman in black. Kettle Lad noticed something odd however. It was the feather that the woman in black left behind, he walked up to pick the feather up and examined it like freshly manicured nails. He clapped and from beneath his gown a machine dropped onto the floor. He put the feather into the machine and carried it over to the crying boy to keep him company while his technology did its work.

Tea Girl rushed down Planeroad and onto Summer Drive in hot pursuit of the culprit. Never in her life had she sprinted this fast in a tea stained dress, or any dress in general. As a matter of fact, she had never ran this fast in her life! She felt so alive, so into the action, she loved it! Her phone rang and without even slowing down she pulled it out, it was Kettle Lad.

" What's up? " She said, she had gone almost a mile without even feeling exhaustion already.

" It seems our evil doer left behind a little souvenir, A feather. From further examination it appears as if it belongs to a miss Dastardly Deans, a world renowned figure collector. " He said.

" World renowned ey? " She said without needing to catch her breath " Must have some pretty rare stuff. "

" Well she isn't world renowned for that, she's actually has a huge bounty on her head for swindling and stealing almost all of her collection. Good news though, not only is her bounty high but she only lives a mile away from the shop in Bell Summit apartments."

" That's 2 great pieces of news! I'm actually already a mile away from the shop AND with that bounty we'll be able to have our own farm! Imagine the chickens and cows and ducks and oh my gosh I'm so hyped " Tea Girl was talking a million miles a minute, in sync with her running speed.

" Where are you right now? I'll give you directions to her location. " Kettle Lad cheered, a huge wardrobe of fashion on his mind.

" I just past Lemur place, how close am I? " The hyper heroine squealed.

" Let us see... " Kettle Lad paused while he typed in his custom made search engine, then paused again after the results showed up.

" Well I don't have all day! " Tea Girl yelled, running in place to not lose momentum.

" Darling you… It seems you ran towards the opposite direction, you are 2 miles away from it instead of just a mile up the street. "

Tea Girl's running in place slowly started to dwindle to wobbling, her expression went from one of determination to a blank, pale face of despair. She looked up into the sky and screamed something I dare not repeat, gotta keep this series accessible to the younger folks. A cloud of steam erupted from her tea pot bun on her head, muffling out Kettle Lad's taxicab request.

20 or so minutes went by before the Taxi Cab arrived, an exhausted Tea Girl got in and sat down.

" Bell Summit apartments please. She took deep breaths, the cab driver nodded and drove on. His eyes kept looking back in the rear view mirror, not at the road behind but at Tea Girl, this made her nervous.

" So sweet cheeks, you new around here? " He smirked." Sorry I'm not up for much conversation." She said, speaking the truth and also avoiding the cab driver's flirting.

The cab driver frowned and continued to drive. Minutes later he asked another question.

" You seeing anybody? " he asked, a smug look on his greasy face.

" Look, I'm really tired and not up for conversation, please leave me alone. " She sighed as she got a text from Kettle Lad saying " I'll meet you there ^_^ 3 x3 " Tea Girl rolled her eyes at the amount of emojis he always used.

After many awkward questions and driving as slow as possible, the cab driver arrived at the apartments.

" That'll cost you a kiss " He said laughing as he held out his hand, gesturing for money"

Tea Girl bit her lip in anger and dug  in her purse to the horror of her not having a single dime on her.

" I'm sorry but I don't have any money, can you wait a bit while my sidekick comes to pay you? " She started to sweat nervously as steam started to pillow to the top of the cab.

" You heretic! " He yelled and pounded the dashboard. He locked the doors in the cab and started to crawl back to attack Tea Girl. Tea Girl screamed but then calmed down, because she remembered she was actually a heroine and she had very thick plot armor, she pulled out her tea gun and glued the taxi driver to the wheel with her legendary sticky tea attack. The steam from her move along with the emotion produced amount had melted a hole in the top of the cab, she crawled out and looked around for Kettle Lad, who was surprisingly, or unsurprisingly, distracted by his appearance in the pond at the Bell Summit apartment's entrance, the boy with him.

" Are you serious Kettle Lad, I could have been a goner in there!" Tea Girl angrily said and she hopped down from the cab, stomping towards her unsupportive sidekick.

" You know dear, if you were actually in trouble I would have helped you. You're a big girl now and can take care of yourself, now regardless if you stay mad at me or not we have a figurine to find and a thief to take out. " Kettle Lad flipped his hair and walked up the stairs, the little boy following behind.

" Okay then " Tea Girl said to herself, realizing the truth in her partner's words. She had came a long way from the helpless wannabe she was in hero school. And what just happened really showed how much she had grown. Behold, backstory material for another day!

They arrived at Dastardly Dean's apartment, techno music ablaze with loud Kyuhuhu's in the background.

" This is the place for sure. " Kettle Lad said pulling a bobby pin from out of his luscious hair to pick the lock. The boy stood behind Tea Girl, clinging to her leg as Kettle Lad ready the signal to break in.

" 3, 2, 1" He said before Tea Girl interrupted him.

" Wait, I wanna be the one to bust in " She whispered walking up to the door.

" But the element of surprise is the best weap-" Kettle Lad was interrupted by Tea Girl's leg kicking in the door.

" Freeze! " She screamed as a giant cracking noise echoed out the door. There stood an older woman in a feather covered maid outfit, with a horrified look on her face.

" We've got you now, Dastardly Deans! I am Tea Girl and by the herbal leaves of justice you shall be apprehended! " She shouted proudly, still having an adrenaline rush from the run and the confrontation with the sleazy cab driver.

The woman fell to her knees and started scooping up stone pieces into her arms.

" You fools! You just startled me while I was dancing with my new prized possession and caused me to kill her! " She scooped up the pieces into her arms, the young boy now crying as well, knowing that his family may be doomed.

Tea Girl put her hands against her cheeks and started to tear up as well. She may have captured the villain, but yet again she ruined the objective she was trying to save. Kettle Lad was wrong she thought to herself, she was still a failure at life.

Kettle Lad called the local authority to come and arrest the cab driver and Dastardly Deans, he noticed the dozens upon dozens of dolls Deans had stolen. He asked her a question.

" Tell me miss, what exactly is going on here? Why are you dressed up like an anime maid and why the thievery of so many figures? "

She started to explain, filling in the time until the police arrived.

" When I was a young girl, I wanted to be a doll maker and merchant, but my parents always put me down, they wanted me to become a doctor or something like that. It drove me crazy, so when I was finally able to escape them, my sanity had ran thin and I began making up for lost time. I would steal collectible figure after collectible figure until I had a nice collection built up. I paid for this apartment with selling figures I was bored with and had grew tired of dancing with. When I heard that a Kawaii Titan was in town, I had to get it. Not because it was worth a fortune, but because It was just a perfect dance partner. But now… It's gone. As is my end of the line"

She began to break down more and more, police sirens coming in the distance.

" And of the feather that you left behind? " Kettle Lad asked, holding up the piece of the puzzle that led Dastardly Deans to her demise.

" That was from my first ever doll, the only one I had ever earned rightfully. I sold lemonade for 15 years to raise money for it, it was a Karasu Raven Maiden, it's what my current outfit is based off of. I had it stolen from me, that really sent me off the deep in and started my life of crime, "

Kettle Lad put his arms Tea Girl and the young boy as the sun began to set, the police had arrived and was climbing up the stairs to capture the poor old woman who was always down on her luck. A depressing atmosphere loomed over all parties involved.

About half an hour passed as the police gathered up the dolls and the criminals, both the cab driver, who it took over an hour to unglue from the seat and Dastardly Deans. Kettle Lad caught one of the police officers and asked him a questions.

" Say sir, can you tell me why her bounty was so high? She had no powers, she was just an ordinary thief. "

"I have no clue what you exactly said, you'll need to speak clearer " The man in blue groaned.

Kettle Lad defaboulized his voice and repeat himself. The officer still had a hard time understanding him, but replied anyway.

" Her bounty was from a doll making company. It isn't cold hard cash but rather credit towards any products of theirs. They even mentioned making a one of a kind custom figure for whoever brought her to justice. "

Kettle Lad smirked and thanked the officer, but not before asking for a number to claim the reward.

He walked over to the young boy and Tea Girl, both who were quite down in the dumps with his plan.

" I have some good news! " He squealed, the boy looking up in hope while Tea Girl's face remained buried in her arms.

" The bounty for capturing Deans will cover for the broken statue, you're parents are going to be okay young one! Maybe even a surplus of money will come your way since the replacement will not only be a Kawaii Titan, but a one of a kind edition, I have a feeling the man who this all depends on will be delighted to hear. " Kettle Lad cheered, changing the young boy's face from sadness to pure bliss. He hugged Kettle Lad before running to the cops for a ride home.

" Before you go, may we please have your name? " Kettle Lad requested.

" It's Jacob." He smiled and said, hopping into the police car, not a worry in the world as he knew his parents were going to be okay.

Kettle Lad sat down by Tea Girl and patted her on the back, she groaned and began to speak.

" You were wrong, I mess up every mission somehow and I always need your help. You're supposed to be MY sidekick, I should be able to take care of stuff on my own and rescue you, not the other way around. " She began to sob.

Kettle Lad paused for a moment and then took a deep breath before giving his partner in crime-fighting a lecture.

" But you did take care of everything by yourself. You didn't need my help when it came to escaping that creep, yeah, you broke the statue and kinda rushed in but it worked out for the better. The reward will make sure Jacob's family is going to be okay AND because a custom made one of a kind figure will be going to the guy who originally pawned it, he'll be getting a heck of a nice surprise than what he originally planned for. If he's a nice guy, he'll probably help Jacob out a bit more too! You see, though things didn't go as planned, everything came out okay, maybe even better if things would have went normally! You did a great job. " Kettle Lad hugged Tea Girl and she spoke in a muffled tone:

" But I didn't do everything by myself, if it wasn't for you we wouldn't have broken the lock or have even found Dastardly Deans. "

" You're silly " Kettle Lad said " We're a team, we are supposed to use each other's help. That's what partners are for, they help each other out. " Kettle Lad was about to continue his speech, his figurative hand on the figurative sap meter before an officer came up to him and delivered the news.

" The cab driver that was captured had a small bounty on his head as well, it isn't much, but you've earned it " The officer placed a small bag full of money on top of Tea Girl's head then walked off. Tea Girl took the bag off her head and for the first time in seemingly hours, looked up and opened her eyes, her eyes and cheeks red from the events of today. She counted the money and turned to her partner and asked.

" Say Kettle Lad, what's your favorite flavor of Milkshake? " She asked, a smile cracked her face.

" You know how I am with dairy, it will go straight to my thighs" He replied sass filled, flipping his hair and going back into vain mode.

" You're going to get a milkshake and you are going to like it! " Tea Girl giggled and got up, Kettle Lad sighing and rolling his eyes, trying to hide the dorkiest smile the world has ever seen.

" Race you there! " They both said, as they began to run towards the milkshake shop, but due to their code, ran together, with pinkies locked. Another challenge conquered together.

© 2016 Nitsua

Author's Note

Any feedback is appreciated! I didn't have the best education when it came to literature in school, so any feedback is good feedback. if anything made you laugh or say " aww " please tell me!

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Added on February 21, 2016
Last Updated on February 21, 2016
Tags: tea, teagirl, kettlelad, heroes, funny, comedy, romance, fluff, figurines, fabulous



Hot Springs, AR

Hello, I'm Austin, age 21 from Arkansas. I'm ashamed to say that I'm not exactly the best writer, my grammar isn't top notch and my punctuation is subpar, but I have a lot of ideas I would love to sha.. more..