A Sinner's Lament.

I. Confessions of a Sinner

I've lied to many people to get away from being reprimanded.

Including my parents who thought I was a saint.

I was a saint in their own eyes,

I know I have pledged my ways...

...but the enticement to do the wrong was unbearably strong.

I've killed vagueness with vulgarity.

In which too much attention drove me to the spotlight.

I've punished those whom I've thought,

Had they stolen my rightful spot.

Made friends with people carrying pitchforks.

I was vain, haughty and greedy.

I am not proud of it now.

I know I once was.

I have my share of love found and love lost.

I have my share of wicked infidelities.

Wicked schemes of revenge.

Lust to unimaginable extremity.

I am not happy.

I am not proud of all the things I've done.

I have suffered severe consequence.

Consequences that made me writhe in pain.

I was emotionally drained, bleeding and dying spiritually.

Where I can't be found.

II. Redemption of a Sinner

First time in my life I closed my eyes.

Knelt down to pray, I asked for pardon against my sins.

"Would He ever forgive me"? I asked myself.

Because I know I am not worthy of His grace.

I just knelt not thinking of anything.

What do I pray? I asked myself again.

Then a shadow came over me.

I blinked open and saw the sun was in my eyes.

Too bright that I couldn't see.

I heard a voice inside my head.

It said, "My child, why are you afraid of me"?

Come to me,

I will give you rest.

I knew it was Him.

I felt so ashamed.

I felt so scared.

I felt so little.

His voice called out my deepest fears and pains.

Everything that has been pulling my life down seem to loosen its weight.

His soothing words calmed my beating heart.

My nights turned to days.

He said, "I love you".

I will never forsake you.

I have been waiting for you.

I cried with all my heart.

I cried all the hurts and the sins that has kept me bondage all these time.

I cried all the pain that tortured me and left me for dead all these years.

I choked on my tears when I envisioned myself kneeling at His feet.

He pulled me up and cradled me in His arms.

The whole time, He was there.

When I felt so alone and no one to turn to,

He was there.

He loved me despite my inequities.

He cared for me.

He died for my sins.

He redeemed me of my sins.

I know JESUS loves me.

Reviews

[Trace]

It is a beautiful thing to understand and know we are not in this life journey alone. Very nicely written. Trac

[Veronica DiMarco]

This is the real me.

:] THANK YOU TRACE!

[Trace]

I think all your poetry is the real u

[Veronica DiMarco]

It is .. a matter of fact ;]

[MsJewel]

To error in our ways and seek redemtion - you have expressed both so beautifully. The hardest part - I believe - is forgive oneself. A well written poem and a pleasure to read.

:) Julie

[Veronica DiMarco]

Thank you Julie. It i s what keeps me going, to forgive is to be forgiven.
Thank you for reading.

[Vidya Bacchus]

With faith and prayers all things are possible.We have all done things that we are ashamed and sorry for but with certainty if you call he will answer .Your poem is very good thank you for penning :)

[Veronica DiMarco]

Now I will answer your question if that person is still alive with that kind of vendetta I have for him... He is alive and breathing..hahaha!
..what changed me.. This is a true story of my changed heart. Once you are touched by HIM, you can never turn back...
Thank you for your comment...it's a great inspiration!

[Vidya Bacchus]

You are most welcome and people like that are best kept out of our lives:)

[Veronica DiMarco]

true indeed.. but the most difficult part in my life is accepting and forgiving. that is where HE comes in...;]

[Vidya Bacchus]

Hell i did 't say anything about forgiving he sounds like a complete and utter a*s lol.But forgiving him i guess will help u to move on so......

[Vidya Bacchus]

Yes god tells us to forgive and move on and as long as you pray you will never be alone

[Veronica DiMarco]

very true indeed! ;]

[SeventeenPoet]

it truly is a beautiful poem :)

[Veronica DiMarco]

thank you! i think so too.. :)