Qimar [Gamble]

I ask why.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why do I hear a strangled whimper everytime I thrust my bare feet against the soil, the sickening thorny chocker around my neck chained in more unbreakable metal, hauling me back to an unpleasant reality?

 

Why do I gasp as I'm viciously yanked back and away from the beautifully sorrowful rain cloud I yearn for, my limp arms and legs grinded against the pebbles, leaving cuts and stings around the corners, to quickly heal and resurrect?

 

Why do I learn a new weakness everytime I try to fasten my feet and challenge the jeering clanking of the rusted metal?

 

Why do I end up in tears and sniffles of overwhelm everytime I promise never to cry again?

 

Why do I feel congealed in the eyes of those who outwardly view me, everytime I try to breathe and walk forward, certain that I can be what I want to be?

 

Why do I realize I am lost in the fog and smoke and dust everytime I trace an unwavering track from my ignorant piece of innocence?

 

Why do I confine the pure want to live and trouble my thoughts with the artificial judgmental right or wrong, forgetting the soul of serenity and liberty?

 

Why do I ask just to stare back at a wretched echo?

 

Why do we gamble away a lifetime seeking the truth of who we are?

Author's Note

*Image: Gamble
*by ~LukeeeB
*Link: http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=§ion=&q=gamble#/d1zpfhi

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

I found this resonant. The metaphor of being leashed is a strong one for me - maybe because I have an affinity for canines. This is an eloquent poem

[Calypso]

There are times when I believe I know who I am and what's so great about me and something will happen and that image of myself with be destroyed.
This poem made me think of this. It makes me remember my 10 year old self.

[zappy]

wow a really deep feeling . wonderful job.

[My Fair Lady]

Deep questions that press themselves into the very soul. You, my love, are beyond words.

[Kelsie Eileen Stark]

A great question asked here: "Why do I feel congealed in the eyes of those who outwardly view me, everytime I try to breathe and walk forward, certain that I can be what I want to be?"
This piece leaves us with thought provoking questions that only life can answer.
Beautiful job.

[SoLongAndThanksForAllTh..]

The suffering in this poem has an almost spiritual element to it. For some reason, and despite my aversion to organised religion, it reminds me of the people who flog themselves with chains as a sign of their faith. I think that comes not from the intensity of the suffering but the way in which it seems so pointless. The narrator is clearly in great pain but there is no help or relief from the endless questioning in her head.

There are several excellent pieces of word play in this poem. My favourite is the concept of "my ignorant piece of innocence". Although there's a simple link to the saying "ignorance is bliss" you've managed to invoke a much deeper idea that the ignorance is something that is almost tangible - some sort of mental life preserver that can never be released.

A well written and intellectually stimulating poem.

[Abdul Aziz]

I must say your use of language is very impressive! And you've penned down, in original words, what everyone of us thinks about at some point or other in our lives. The final question, though, is what really intrigues me. Is seeking the truth of who we are really tantamount to gambling our life away?

[Coyote Poetry]

"Why do I feel congealed in the eyes of those who outwardly view me, every time I try to breathe and walk forward, certain that I can be what I want to be?"
I like the photo and the words in the poem. We run in circle till one day we realize. Only thing that is important is what we want and need. Some people learn till it is too late. Last line is my favorite. A outstanding poem. Thank you.
Coyote

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

Excellent questions.....I love poems full of questions. I find myself so often in the throes of introspection, I relate well to this poem.

[No use.]

breaking through as the conscious probes and basks in the perpetual need for an explanation ~ sometimes we just gotta have a little more faith and let things flow like fluid