Another One of them Days

Straight from the start
the negatives play
the skeptic inside
has it, its way.

Speaks with no vowels
blends in with the drums,
I nod so as
not to look dumb.?.?.

It cuts deep
It cuts deep

Scenarios play out in my head
nonsense and such.
Pessimism as a weapon
manurfacture fears i can't touch.

(well placed)
Mirrors offer
reflections of self hate,
(constant)
whispers and isults infused with my thoughts
my sails deflate.

Go through the motions
bathe, lather with self defeat.
Skip breakfast, instead
it's my pride that i eat.

Not gone anywhere
but feel road weary,
behind shades of distrust
everything looks dreary.

I go for the door
anxiety still calling, I stay...
Oh god no,
Why..???.. not today!..!!..