Look before you leap!

Look before you leap!

A Poem by alanwgraham
"

A dimEric!

"
Look before you leap!

I once met a girl from Tiree
she was rather attracted to me
but I had to change tack
when we got in the sack
and discovered that she was a he!

I'm beginning to think that I'm just
a brief step or two from being dust
it's time for some fun
'fore I pick up the gun
there might be some time left for lust

on Tiree I met a young fellow
I thought that he looked rather mellow
but I got quite a shock
when he started to talk
and she told me her name was Flo

I once knew a fellow from Troon
who used to drink beer from a spoon
but one thing he missed
was getting quite pissed
so I told him that he was a goon

I wish I could stop writing rhymes
I've attempted multiple times
but they keep slipping out
of that there's no doubt
f*** this, I'm off for lunch

woo hoo - freedom!
rhyming's a thing of the past
how long do you think it will la...
gee - that was a close one

I'm sure that you're very impressed
how my battle with rhyming's progressed
it's just like a drug
I feel such a mug
you can see that I just have regressed

© 2019 alanwgraham


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Featured Review

I once met an Alan from Fife
who thought I was somebody's wife
So I showed him my chopper
He said sheesh wot a whopper
And eventually we both got spliced
That's a joke folks innit Alan mate........... Look Before ya Leap made me chuckle... cheers.

Neville


Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Month Ago

I'm amazed how often I get a limerick in reply. Yours is great. I'm glad you added the disclaimer!read more
Neville Pettitt

1 Month Ago

Yeah.. me too.. Have a great weekend Alan.. N



Reviews

Hahaha this read started of more lust and love and all that and winded up with u talkin about how you cant help but rhyme. It was a very humerous read, and it also flowed well. I relate because i also cant help but rhyme :) very well written

Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Week Ago

Thanks Cimmy.
We are in the right place for rhyming. Actually my main thing is short stories .. read more
cimmy wuv xxxooo

6 Days Ago

:) ur welcome
Thanks for reading these Jacob. You probably know that this addiction to rhyming is one symptom of bipolar in some. (and at least one notable other rhymer in the cafe)
Regards.
Alan

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


some times rhyme just compels us to use it...
this is a fun read....a cross between "Lola" and "Take a Walk on the Wild Side"

dodododododododododo

love the swerve away from the rhyme and then back to it...like it's a security blanket...
(sorry Linus)---
good work.
j.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


I used to know Alan from Fife
who had such a wonderful life
he spent all his time
just penning rhyme
or making hot love to my wife!

Loved the first stanza, really cracked me up and set me in train for another jaunt through your word associative thinking. Such a nice diversion to take I must say! Right cheered the day.


Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

2 Weeks Ago

Ta John.
Once i get started on limericks it's a bit like drinking Guinness. I haven't been aw.. read more
OH MY GAWD! I recognize myself in your poem! My rhyming addiction goes exactly like this! I feel I've really become more "like other normal writers" whenever I manage to squeeze off a little free verse once in a while. But I always go back to my rhyming addiction. I love limericks, which are a special kind of rhyme, so satisfying. Only Norman does a rash of limericks now & then. He just had a heart valve repaired in London on Monday, all turned out better than expected. Anyhow, back to your poem . . . This is YOU at your finest! I can feel your OCD rigidity running right alongside your fun-loving free-flowing nature (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Month Ago

Ta Margie. I'm trying hard to get these damn rhymes out of my head. I've been editing my collection .. read more
I once met an Alan from Fife
who thought I was somebody's wife
So I showed him my chopper
He said sheesh wot a whopper
And eventually we both got spliced
That's a joke folks innit Alan mate........... Look Before ya Leap made me chuckle... cheers.

Neville


Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Month Ago

I'm amazed how often I get a limerick in reply. Yours is great. I'm glad you added the disclaimer!read more
Neville Pettitt

1 Month Ago

Yeah.. me too.. Have a great weekend Alan.. N
Your stanzas are great fun Alan and you know for sure how much I love rhyme. I would say though, you have to be careful these days when dating. You might not get what you expected. Have a happy day.

Chris

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Month Ago

Great advice Chris. Thanks for reading this nonsense.
Alan
Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

You are welcome Alan, and it is not nonsense :)
Keep it going me lad, the verses are far from bad. With a smile on my face you've flavoured my taste: i am set for a happier day now!

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alanwgraham

1 Month Ago

I like it kitty. Perhaps - my day will be far from sad! My stories are often serious so these are li.. read more
kitty

1 Month Ago

Have a 'Smiley, happy day'!
This is a funny one, Alan. The confusing of genders is something a few of my old sailor friends probably still have nightmares over. As for the rhymes, I think they're just fine!

Posted 1 Month Ago



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Added on May 31, 2019
Last Updated on June 2, 2019

Author

alanwgraham
alanwgraham

Fife, Scotland, United Kingdom



About
Married with three grown up kids, I retired early from teaching physics but have always enjoyed a second life enjoying the outdoors, particularly the mountains. In my mid forties I experienced a manic.. more..

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