autobiography

I have a weakness for love poems,
For art,
Especially when it belongs to you.

I have a hard time writing poems without the word “I”.
I guess that makes me a narcissist,
Or just lonely.

I need to impress you,
Its something that always burns deep inside me,
I think of ways to inspire you,
And mesmerize you.
Now I guess I'm borderline pathetic.
But I've been walking that line for years.
You're not the first or the last to inspire that from me.

I need to read books that make me sad,
Because that’s how I remember how to be happy.
I know that sounds strange,
But you’ve never read Angela’s Ashes.

I used to be inspired by flowers,
And the harsh glare of neon lights in LA,
But now I'm jaded,
And I take those lights and flowers for granted.

I used to love the sunrise,
And rainbows, and colors named after foods.

I used to love boys,
And manicures and booze.
Until you showed me men and cocaine.
Men don’t care about manicures.
Men care about legs, and flat stomachs, and constant smiles.

So I gave up men and cocaine.
And I love boys and manicures again,
The cocaine never wrote me poetry.
Then again, neither did the boys.

This is my autobiography.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

An autobiography indeed: painful and tragic and full of life's blackness.. until the end.

' I need to read books that make me sad, Because that's how I remember how to be happy.' I've read isimilar before but each time i realise it more and more, so true.

' So I gave up men and cocaine.
And I love boys and manicures again,
The cocaine never wrote me poetry.
Then again, neither did the boys. '

That is so well constructed.. it says far more than appears - great writing.

[A. Amos]

My my deep, dark and beautiful you are gifted my friend and know the right art how to use the words, beautiful and magically written. Well done

[Shalini Dinesh (Poet's ..]

wow, nice autobiography... as many other have already said, the last two stanzas are my fav part too....

[Gus McFarland]

"I need to read books that make me sad, Because that's how I remember how to be happy"

I really like that line. The entire work is very well done, many great lines. I better read more of your work. The two I have read make me want to know more.

Gus

[BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE]

You sure pack a punch with your memoirs i am guessing these are from hard times well we have all been there and i'm sure you are stronger for your experiences, have you ever been to london?
I would love to visit LA but i guess i will have to await my huge inheritence whenever that is and now i am caught between two worlds of living in london and luzern i know where i would rather be in that fresh cool swiss air but it is so darn expensive living there and i am going to buy myself a winter chalet and write books and poems infront of a roaring fire sipping glogg and dreaming of my lost lover.

[Chirpy!]

this, of all your writing, is my favorite.

[Christel Grady]

This brought a smile to my face and made me giggle. "You showed me men and cocaine"

Refreshing write! :)

[Farrah Grahm]

"I used to love boys,
And manicures and booze.
Until you showed me men and cocaine.
Men don't care about manicures.
Men care about legs, and flat stomachs, and constant smiles.

So I gave up men and cocaine.
And I love boys and manicures again,
The cocaine never wrote me poetry.
Then again, neither did the boys."

My favorite part.
and I don't know if you did it on purpose but the narcissistic theme is throughout, how you use "I" or "me" in every sentence. This is great. Its kind of like a coming of age poem, where giving up the cocaine changes everything. and that's great, it's real hard to do. kudos.

[Scott Lynn]

It's a pretty bold step when someone decides to take their own personal tragedies and learn from them, and then present them to the world for other people to gain the same lesson. You have done both here, beautifully and with grace. I applaud you.

[Ashley Robel]

This is a true insight to the soul. I really enjoyed this line.

I used to be inspired by flowers,
And the harsh glare of neon lights in LA,
But now I'm jaded,
And I take those lights and flowers for granted.

It kind of makes it seem like you feel like you've lost something along the way. I love how you can take feelings that are so simple and make them into something so gigantic, so we can really feel it.