Liar

A Poem by Kar

Inspired by What's Up with Love? 2 (Ada Apa dengan Cinta? 2)

"Treat all your words like promises," my mother said when I was merely a dumb child, not even able to differenciate left and right yet. It was an advice I couldn't comprehend, as a young boy. "What you say reflects who you are."

They do, and I am a liar.

When I left you for the first time, I whispered to you in private, "We will make this work, I promise." You believed me with all your heart, I saw in your eyes, the way they gleamed, how they smiled warmly. Cautious, but trusting.

When you came to visit me for the first time, I said, "I love you, and nothing will ever get between us. I will not let it."

I am sorry. I apologise. I made a mistake. I am a liar.
Because I let something get between us, break us apart. My mind.

For once, I listened to my conscience, and I made a horrendous mistake.

A mistake that lasted through hundreds and thousands of full moons.

False hope that flew you to the brightest stars. And then down, down you went.

Love, a constant state of pleasure and fantasy. A privilege. An opportunity.

"Treat all your words like promises," my mother said when I was merely a dumb child, when I couldn't even say 'promise' correctly yet. "What you say reflects who you are."

They really do, and I am a foolish boy who thinks with his heart too often that when he thinks with something other than it, his life crumbles. I am a foolish boy, and my life is you.