Tell Me

Tell Me

A Poem by Amandaaa Caroline (:
"

More raw emotions..

"
Promised myself I wouldn't,
For him, I won't cry,
I thought I could be strong,
But here, on the floor... I lie.

I can't stop myself,
I have to calm down somehow,
I need to stop being weak,
I need to stop, right now.

All the shaky actions,
Insecurity is shining through,
The littlest things set me off,
Because I'm thinking of you.

I won't ever have closure,
'Til I know what I did wrong,
I can't stop the tears,
And I can't yet move on.

Something inside of me,
Has to know what I did...
Tell me what I did wrong,
Then of me, you may be rid.

I want to move on,
To find a real, loving guy,
Who loves me, only me,
And doesn't tell lie after lie.

Yes, tears fall down my face,
But not because I miss you.
Simply because, I never could see,
That your love for me wasn't true.

© 2013 Amandaaa Caroline (:


My Review

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Featured Review

This poem is really good! It's packed with raw emotions.
My word of advice: Everything will be alright in the end! I promise you it probably wasn't your fault. If you need anyone to vent out your feeling you can message me or just write more well-written poems. Whatever suits you. :)
100/100

-Invisible Girl :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Hahaha, thank you, invisible girl (:
The Invisible Girl

11 Years Ago

You're welcome! :D



Reviews

Beautiful! I love how well you have expressed your emotions!
I do hope that you are feeling better, Amanda. We all have suffered for love because love without pain isn't true love. (or well, that's what I think lol)
Hope things are going well with you,
-Penelope H.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Hahaha, that's extremely true :P thank you Penelope, I definitely am doing better (:
Euro

11 Years Ago

Glad to hear that! Don't fall again for now! :D
This is totally relatable.
I really love how clearly you show your emotions through this.
Excellent job on this:)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Thank you (:
I love your poem.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Thanks!
Wow..I've never read a poem such as this, full of as most of the reviews say, emotions , deep and true, the way I felt it as a reader is not explainable yet there is even a greater flicker when you find yourself in the corners of some lines..Simply majestic.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Awwww, thank you so much!
This was great! Emotional, flowing, just perfect

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Thank you, David (:
David the writer

11 Years Ago

Np, thanx for sharing
this poem has great emotion and was very well penned! i like how it started in a state of weakness but ended in a stronger light... this write shows purity and reality to the bad effects of love and what it does to the heart. I thank you for sharing it and hope to read more of your work soon, yours truely Danielle ;)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much, Danielle (:
Oh wow, I really loved this Amanda. It's so good and I agree that it's packed with raw emotions. It's a situation that's happened to a lot of other people, including myself. A liar is something I can't stand more than anything in the world. Liars to me are cowards. They're too scared to tell the truth from the beginning and saving you from the hurt. I have been with too many guys that lied to me. I thought about one particular guy, while reading your poem. Yes, it hurts deep down because basically I let him get away with it. I believed him for so long too. I feel bad for any girl that walks into his troublesome life though. I totally relate with the last stanza,

"Yes, tears fall down my face,
But not because I miss you.
Simply because, I never could see,
That your love for me wasn't true." --Wow! Wonderful and powerful lines.

I only noticed one minor mistake that I thought I would point out.

In the third stanza, third line--I don't think "littlest" is really a word. Maybe try instead
*The smallest things set me off,
Because I'm thinking of you."

Ashley Rivers--Dream BIG and you'll win BIG ;)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Call_Me_Miss_Imperfect

11 Years Ago

Haha really? Wow :) I didn't know. You're welcome.
Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Yeah, hahaha (: I was like second guessing myself, so I figured I would go check.
Call_Me_Miss_Imperfect

11 Years Ago

I didn't know it was a word. It's a *Say what?* kind of moment :D
Pure, raw emotion. Another great write from you Amanda

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Awww, thank you(:
Your emotions are vivid, and ones that speak of the inner depths of your heart!
I am glad to know you are facing reality and attempting to move on!!


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

I am. Thank you (:
Very raw indeed, i can feel the pain and i immediately sympathize. But it's beautifully written and heart wrenching. Brilliant way to vent your feelings - clearly being heart-broken agrees with your writing, but i know you're good even when you aren't.
Lovely piece.
Love to you x

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amandaaa Caroline (:

11 Years Ago

Thank you, Icelanna!

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Added on January 19, 2013
Last Updated on January 19, 2013

Author

Amandaaa Caroline (:
Amandaaa Caroline (:

757, VA



About
I'm a fourteen year old who knows absolutely nothing about writing, but I try to make the best of it. glitter-graphics.com I write likeStephen KingI Write Like by Mémoires, journal .. more..

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