A Raily Ride

A Raily Ride

A Poem by amarlaksh
"

Its intense!

"

As I confide my form into the brownish booth,

With heat in and cold out, the humping of the coach

Copious thoughts slide my mind. Some of shades grey; fairer some

If the humming of wheels in agony stops?

Or like the child, who stares at gate,

If the sweet vendor would ever pass along?

Better still I would be to think,

Like the intense reader, drowned in write,

Who at times glazes to see,

About the cabin for another comrade,

 Nor even I would ponder, upon the maidens,

As the youth with a book held, do with slight stares

Like that of sage who tells beads of rosary,

With murmurs quiet and nervous mind

 I would never think alike.

The man I am like,

Is one that tells about a raily ride

 

                      ---- Amar laksh

© 2012 amarlaksh


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Reviews

A splendid read and write...Thank you for sharing...:)

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

amarlaksh

10 Years Ago

Thanks for your lovely review Sami :)
Sami Khalil

10 Years Ago

My pleasure...Any time....:)
Yeah !! u cn never think alike :P and that is what made you forget the thing u had to do aftr tuitons..
Well all i can say is These little lines hide a big truth in them..This one was deep! :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


This one is just fabulous...!! i just love to read it...!! :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


amarlaksh

11 Years Ago

Thnx Sonali!!! :D
You are a great write and I'm yet to be disappointed with anything of yours I have read. What I love most about this peace is the way you pull the reader in through the line "like the intense reader, drowned in write", for me this was the highlight as it is really engaging. All I can say is perhaps have a second look as there may be some unnecessary or misused punctuation, for example, I felt the comma after "ponder" and "held" interrupted the flow slightly. All in all though, fantastic

Posted 11 Years Ago


amarlaksh

11 Years Ago

thank u very much willow for ur beautiful review
ADORATION...

Posted 11 Years Ago


Loved it! The imagery is great and its beautifully written!

Posted 11 Years Ago


perceptive

Posted 11 Years Ago


amarlaksh

11 Years Ago

Thanks
Nice poem, i like it

Posted 11 Years Ago


its quite original...nicely done...

Posted 11 Years Ago


amarlaksh

11 Years Ago

Thank you mam :)
being me

11 Years Ago

:)
Terrific piece.

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on December 31, 2012
Last Updated on December 31, 2012

Author

amarlaksh
amarlaksh

Agra, Atheist, India



About
Well i am just a seventeen year old creative kid who likes to read and write more..

Writing
Quotes 4 Quotes 4

A Poem by amarlaksh



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